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Allright, today im just starting to really feel the pressure and need to get the hell outa my home state of Montana and town that I've been in for over 31 years. Getting tired of the same old people, same narrow minded college town girls with no desire to date and or too stuck up to bother, same crappy, unreliable weather patterns, same old small town mentality, same stupid mountains, ect...ect... I'm just really starting to feel the need for more and bigger in my life. A bit of a back story first:
Born and raised here obviously, I went to college here, got my associates in IT management, got some certifications, worked as a tech in back room for a local IT place for a few years and now im doing home based work for a large investment firm across the country which I do have the possibility of relocating, but it would all depend on timing and availability of a spot in a town anywhere across the nation. I do really like the job other then some long days driving on the highways as a result of my states spread out town system, so going to an urban environment with many more clients may or may not be enjoyable for me, hard to say at this point as my workload would increase alot but less long distance driving. My biggest worry about this however in this current economy, im having a hard time deciding if I really want to rock the boat as I just finished paying off the last of my consolidated credit card debt after all these years which feels good. Now I only now have my car as a debt, which I don't mind, I prefer having a newer car as thats how I roll. Granted, a bigger town will have more job opportunities, but also alot more competition to deal with, especially in the IT industry. In short, I know I will probably have a hard time finding a decent paying IT related job in most larger towns and I'm not sure if I'm quit ready to leave my comfortable and reliable job nest egg for that is my biggest worry about moving unless someone can point me in a direction of a town that has seen a steady or uprising job market in the IT sector.
My other big issue is I know I will have a very hard time dealing with not being able to see my folks across town anymore as we are a very close family and my parents sort of rely on me for some things, mostly tech related and physical worked. But I also have very few friends left in my town, my best friend has gone MIA and I doubt I'll ever see him again, another friend is moving soon and a gal pal I met after my break up is just very busy to do much anymore with me. I think I'm getting to the point where I need to break off that close connection with my family a bit and find myself in this new stage of my life. I had a 5 year relationship that ended back last Nov and its taken me all this time with therapy, new OCD medication and soul searching to get to this point in my life where I feel better about myself, sorta reborn and ready for the next stage in my life. I feel I would also to continue being a bachelor for awhile before I introduce another woman in my life for a variety of reasons. I would like to date more for fun but the big issue with that is I have NO DESIRE to ever have children for a variety of personal reasons which I won't get into here. Needless to say, that cuts down on ALOT of potential ladies that I could date in my area where the population isn't that big to begin with. Its even harder due to the fact to find my kinda gal that I want to date and maybe marry is really hard in my college based town, as the girls are either too young and immature and just want to party, too busy with college and or career or just want to breed like crazy and raise a family, none of which appease me at all. I'm not a bar scene kinda except on rare social fun occasions, I don't club, I don't drink heavily in public and I just prefer being a quiet, stay at home geek, which brings me to my next point. I don't feel comfortable at all walking into a bar or club scene by myself as im not a very outgoing kinda guy naturally, im pretty shy though I have been working hard to smile more in public, start casual conversation with guys and gals, but its not easy at times. I don't own a dog, I don't care much for them, I have a cat that I love dearly so no meeting people at the dog parks for me either. I'm getting slowly better at being less recluse thanks to new medication and therapy. I'm going to the gym more, being outside more *when we have good weather*trying to be more sociable by smiling public and starting general conversation with both guys and gals, but its not easy and not always possible every single day, its draining for an introvert like me.
By far the biggest reason I wanna move is I'm REALLY, REALLY needing to have more people around that I can meet with that like the same kinda things I do. To find unique social gathering type places, meet new people and friends and socialize and do things with to help keep me busy and have fun while I stay single in the meantime. My town/state horrendously sucks for having a selection of people who enjoy and or love gaming, technology, ect..ect... essentially what we do on this forum. The small selection of people that do exist are recluse and we basically have no social settings to promote gatherings and having LAN parties or comic con type conventions in my town which I REALLY, REALLY want to be a part of. I want to be able to go to technology shows and convections, to have places to take my PC rig and start LAN partying again with lots of people like me in a variety of ages and even sexes would be nice for a change. So I need some input and suggestions on where would be some ideal larger based towns in certain states that would be good for a reborn, geeky, hard working, fairly in shape, early 30's bachelor to move to for a new stage in his life. I do a have a few requirements though FYI:
1. NO huge towns like Seattle. That's overkill for a small town guy like me who's semi republican and uncomfortable about certain things I'm not used to being around, especially minorities and towns with lots of gangs and hoods. I don't have that "California" based mentality and I doubt I ever will. Needless to say, don't recommend California at all, or New York, as I'll probably get shot onsite for being a dumbass from a small hick town and state. I've thought about Portland for many years as its like my hometown but bigger and better, a nice balance of size, urban sprawl and still having lots of nature around.
2. A balance of liberal minded and conservative people. I would be considered a centrist in regards to many things. I grew up in a fairly liberal town with lots of hippies and a big college *for my states size* so I would really enjoy a change from being away from a college town and having more conservative people that also have more of an open mind. So you can forget Salt Lake City basically. I was raised Lutheran, so still hold the core values of Christianity, so I won't get along real good with being surrounded by pushy Muslims, Jews or die hard Catholics unless they are spread out. I mind my own business so I ask others to do the same for me. Basically, don't recommend me a town with a one way only mentality among the population, it won't work for me.
3. More tech based minded people and community. I want to be able to go to big LAN parties, tech meetings and conventions, costume getgothers and stuff like that as I'm that kinda person with those types of interests. Or least move to a town were I'm closer to places that host those types of things. This by far is the biggest reason I want to move, so town must have more opportunities and people like this for me
4. Nicer weather. I'm so sick of Montana's crappy and unreliable weather systems, cold, snowless winters and lackluster summers and springs. I want more sunshine so I can enjoy bike riding, going to a beach, get back to rollerblading and just being outside in general and having my car look shiny and clean for longer periods of time. I do go to the gym to keep in shape, but Im far from a gym rat and I don't mesh with people of the *all or nothing* gym mentality FYI.
5. NO EXTREMES OF WEATHER! One thing I very much liked about Montana is that our mountains broke up extremes of weather and I prefer to keep it that way in a new town and state. In short, DO NOT recommend cities where I have to worry about hurricanes, typhoons or tornadoes that can blow my ass off the face of the earth and likely kill me. No way, no thanks.
6. No moving to the bible belt area or east coast. End of discussion.
Thanks for reading my long backstory, needs and I guess ranting a bit lol! Please feel free to give me suggestions, comments or incite on what I should and should not do and go. Let me know if I need to clarify or elaborate on anything. Thanks for any info you can give me!
OK, I will admit it was a lot to read and I skimmed parts, sorry.
My initial thought was Colorado Springs or Fort Collins, I'm in Colorado, so they come to mind first. Both a good mix of conservative & liberal, better weather, not too large, no where near a beach, but lots of sun. Next is Austin, but the heat and humidity might be too much of a shock. I've lived in Portland area and I'm not sure it would be a great fit weather-wise or ideologically, hang around the Portland forms for a better sense of the area. You might also look into Omaha, Minneapolis and smaller mid-western cities that may fit your sensibilities more than places in the South or Northeast.
I've thought ALOT about Portland, I like the look of the city alot, driven through many times over the years and really like the look and layout. I went and spent some time their last year in Sept and had a blast and I had good weather while I was visiting. I have close family friends I stayed with and could stay with if I move.
But it seems its grandure and splendure of Portland is not shared among people on this forum from what i'm seeing....
I like Portland, but it is not the place many think it is. Since you have visited, you have a better perspective, it may be a good place for you. Being that you have friends there, maybe you can start sending out resumes with their address and see if you can find a job that appeals to you. If you don't try, you'll never know if it's the place for you.
I'd say Madison but you'd have to sacrifice your weather requirement. It can be extreme. Cold winters. (This last winter in WI was a mild one though. That was rare.) And there is possibility of tornado.... but I can't remember the last one that hit Madison.
Denver? It's a major city, but not too huge. Somewhat progressive, I think.
For what it's worth, although I've not been there myself, but I've also read interesting (good) things about Omaha.
Maybe Pittsburgh would be worth checking out? You're getting further east, but many consider that the far east midwest.
You're better off zeroing in on a few of these smaller cities you're interested in and asking on those state forums. And if that particular city has a sub forum all its own, all the better.
It's a shame OP won't consider the East Coast. I was just looking at the blog of a guy a friend of mine thinks I should meet in Nashua, NH, and what a geek geek geek. Everyone around Cambridge/western suburbs seems to be a computer wonk/software person/game player. Sure that OP won't consider this area? It sounds like it would suit him very much except for that weather thing, although I doubt New England weather is worse than Montana, and maybe a lot more mild that one would think.
I remember one co-worker moving to Phoenix and there was only one science-fiction group there, and she was quite disappointed. Me, a guy who plays D&D or something isn't actually something I jump up and salute, but that's the cottage industry here- that and new life forms (biotech).
It is nice to be around a lot of smart people, and smart people with all kinds of interests and fields of endeavor.
Allright, today im just starting to really feel the pressure and need to get the hell outa my home state of Montana and town that I've been in for over 31 years. Getting tired of the same old people, same narrow minded college town girls with no desire to date and or too stuck up to bother, same crappy, unreliable weather patterns, same old small town mentality, same stupid mountains, ect...ect... I'm just really starting to feel the need for more and bigger in my life. A bit of a back story first:
Born and raised here obviously, I went to college here, got my associates in IT management, got some certifications, worked as a tech in back room for a local IT place for a few years and now im doing home based work for a large investment firm across the country which I do have the possibility of relocating, but it would all depend on timing and availability of a spot in a town anywhere across the nation. I do really like the job other then some long days driving on the highways as a result of my states spread out town system, so going to an urban environment with many more clients may or may not be enjoyable for me, hard to say at this point as my workload would increase alot but less long distance driving. My biggest worry about this however in this current economy, im having a hard time deciding if I really want to rock the boat as I just finished paying off the last of my consolidated credit card debt after all these years which feels good. Now I only now have my car as a debt, which I don't mind, I prefer having a newer car as thats how I roll. Granted, a bigger town will have more job opportunities, but also alot more competition to deal with, especially in the IT industry. In short, I know I will probably have a hard time finding a decent paying IT related job in most larger towns and I'm not sure if I'm quit ready to leave my comfortable and reliable job nest egg for that is my biggest worry about moving unless someone can point me in a direction of a town that has seen a steady or uprising job market in the IT sector.
My other big issue is I know I will have a very hard time dealing with not being able to see my folks across town anymore as we are a very close family and my parents sort of rely on me for some things, mostly tech related and physical worked. But I also have very few friends left in my town, my best friend has gone MIA and I doubt I'll ever see him again, another friend is moving soon and a gal pal I met after my break up is just very busy to do much anymore with me. I think I'm getting to the point where I need to break off that close connection with my family a bit and find myself in this new stage of my life. I had a 5 year relationship that ended back last Nov and its taken me all this time with therapy, new OCD medication and soul searching to get to this point in my life where I feel better about myself, sorta reborn and ready for the next stage in my life. I feel I would also to continue being a bachelor for awhile before I introduce another woman in my life for a variety of reasons. I would like to date more for fun but the big issue with that is I have NO DESIRE to ever have children for a variety of personal reasons which I won't get into here. Needless to say, that cuts down on ALOT of potential ladies that I could date in my area where the population isn't that big to begin with. Its even harder due to the fact to find my kinda gal that I want to date and maybe marry is really hard in my college based town, as the girls are either too young and immature and just want to party, too busy with college and or career or just want to breed like crazy and raise a family, none of which appease me at all. I'm not a bar scene kinda except on rare social fun occasions, I don't club, I don't drink heavily in public and I just prefer being a quiet, stay at home geek, which brings me to my next point. I don't feel comfortable at all walking into a bar or club scene by myself as im not a very outgoing kinda guy naturally, im pretty shy though I have been working hard to smile more in public, start casual conversation with guys and gals, but its not easy at times. I don't own a dog, I don't care much for them, I have a cat that I love dearly so no meeting people at the dog parks for me either. I'm getting slowly better at being less recluse thanks to new medication and therapy. I'm going to the gym more, being outside more *when we have good weather*trying to be more sociable by smiling public and starting general conversation with both guys and gals, but its not easy and not always possible every single day, its draining for an introvert like me.
By far the biggest reason I wanna move is I'm REALLY, REALLY needing to have more people around that I can meet with that like the same kinda things I do. To find unique social gathering type places, meet new people and friends and socialize and do things with to help keep me busy and have fun while I stay single in the meantime. My town/state horrendously sucks for having a selection of people who enjoy and or love gaming, technology, ect..ect... essentially what we do on this forum. The small selection of people that do exist are recluse and we basically have no social settings to promote gatherings and having LAN parties or comic con type conventions in my town which I REALLY, REALLY want to be a part of. I want to be able to go to technology shows and convections, to have places to take my PC rig and start LAN partying again with lots of people like me in a variety of ages and even sexes would be nice for a change. So I need some input and suggestions on where would be some ideal larger based towns in certain states that would be good for a reborn, geeky, hard working, fairly in shape, early 30's bachelor to move to for a new stage in his life. I do a have a few requirements though FYI:
1. NO huge towns like Seattle. That's overkill for a small town guy like me who's semi republican and uncomfortable about certain things I'm not used to being around, especially minorities and towns with lots of gangs and hoods. I don't have that "California" based mentality and I doubt I ever will. Needless to say, don't recommend California at all, or New York, as I'll probably get shot onsite for being a dumbass from a small hick town and state. I've thought about Portland for many years as its like my hometown but bigger and better, a nice balance of size, urban sprawl and still having lots of nature around.
2. A balance of liberal minded and conservative people. I would be considered a centrist in regards to many things. I grew up in a fairly liberal town with lots of hippies and a big college *for my states size* so I would really enjoy a change from being away from a college town and having more conservative people that also have more of an open mind. So you can forget Salt Lake City basically. I was raised Lutheran, so still hold the core values of Christianity, so I won't get along real good with being surrounded by pushy Muslims, Jews or die hard Catholics unless they are spread out. I mind my own business so I ask others to do the same for me. Basically, don't recommend me a town with a one way only mentality among the population, it won't work for me.
3. More tech based minded people and community. I want to be able to go to big LAN parties, tech meetings and conventions, costume getgothers and stuff like that as I'm that kinda person with those types of interests. Or least move to a town were I'm closer to places that host those types of things. This by far is the biggest reason I want to move, so town must have more opportunities and people like this for me
4. Nicer weather. I'm so sick of Montana's crappy and unreliable weather systems, cold, snowless winters and lackluster summers and springs. I want more sunshine so I can enjoy bike riding, going to a beach, get back to rollerblading and just being outside in general and having my car look shiny and clean for longer periods of time. I do go to the gym to keep in shape, but Im far from a gym rat and I don't mesh with people of the *all or nothing* gym mentality FYI.
5. NO EXTREMES OF WEATHER! One thing I very much liked about Montana is that our mountains broke up extremes of weather and I prefer to keep it that way in a new town and state. In short, DO NOT recommend cities where I have to worry about hurricanes, typhoons or tornadoes that can blow my ass off the face of the earth and likely kill me. No way, no thanks.
6. No moving to the bible belt area or east coast. End of discussion.
Thanks for reading my long backstory, needs and I guess ranting a bit lol! Please feel free to give me suggestions, comments or incite on what I should and should not do and go. Let me know if I need to clarify or elaborate on anything. Thanks for any info you can give me!
Suggest you get into the outdoor recreation opportunities of what I consider not less than the 3rd most desirable state to live in (AK, ID might possibly be ahead of MT - maybe) and stay put.
You can't fix what ain't broke.
Use your IT skills to online date and find a gal you will like being with.
I am a little concerned about your AA degree. I think in a city you would need a BA to compete for this sort of work.
I adore Portland. However, there are many unemployed and underemployed there right now.
Can you go back to school and get further qualifications? Can you get qualified in the medical field, perhaps as a tech? If you do, the world is your oyster. And Portland has plenty of hospitals and health care facilities which would employ techs.
I like the idea of Colorado Springs for you, as well. I don't care for the weather there, though. But you get to look at Pike's Peak every day, and that is a really fine view.
Are you sure you want to leave your parents? Are you the only child? Lots of stuff to think about.
Why don't you take two weeks and visit Portland or another town and see if you would like to live there?
No, not going back to school. I'm done sitting in a damn desk for hours on end. I also can't mentally handle the stress of the medical field, so I avoid it entirely, I don't handle stress very well, I break down easily. I've visited Portland several times over the years and I liked it alot. No, I have a younger sister, she's moved a few states away and married
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