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Grandparents should be able to spoil their grandkids and if 'waking them from a nap' is a deal breaker for you that is just sad IMO. I use to wake my own kids from a nap if I wanted to play with them and it doesn't seem to have harmed them.
I think grandparents should generally do what the parents ask but the grandparents have done this before and they should be given leeway.
You mean you interrupted your own nap and woke up the baby?
As a mom and grandma, I just think this is so weird. You woke your own kids up to play with them? Bizarre.
I don't think it's bizarre at all. If my kids had been napping for several hours and/or we had plans to do something, etc. I would wake them up. Maybe I just enjoyed playing with my kids more than other people.
Some of my late husband's relatives have been enduring this. Grandma isn't buying daddy a new truck (again!) so he says you will never see the grands until I get it. They have been thru this many times. It's a very sad situation that rips the heart of the grandparents but in many ways some of that falls back to many serious mistakes in raising that now parent.
The horror stories I have heard involve money. Dad is widowed; he finds a women he loves and wants to marry. His kids say “no.” If he marries her there will be no contact with the grandkids, period. The adult kids want dad’s estate when he passes. They fear his estate would go to new wife. In this case, the grandkids are used as leverage.
No, I do not mean a child sized backpack containing a bomb. Rather adult children who withhold the Grandchildren from the Grandparents unless the Grandparents do exactly what the 'adult' children demand of them.
Enslavement is an applicable term for the demands or expectations received by some Grandparents.
Uh.....I believe the term you're referring to is extortion!
Glad I am not the only one in the boat, once my grandson was born we have had to jump through ridiculous hoops to be able to see him. Much of it is because of our meathead son in law, he was already a whiny mama’s boy before the kid was born but has transformed into our daughter in law Karen. His parents are not treated this way and it just makes us feel as if they don’t want us around. Our daughter at least knows better because my father in law has not been much of a grandfather to her.
Uh.....I believe the term you're referring to is extortion!
No, I intended enslavement.
Extortion is very common too, and maybe more common.
Some unfortunate Grandparents may be victims of both, such as "I need you to retire early so that you can provide free childcare to us while we both work, and saying No is not an option if you ever want to see your Grandchildren again."
I don't think it's bizarre at all. If my kids had been napping for several hours and/or we had plans to do something, etc. I would wake them up. Maybe I just enjoyed playing with my kids more than other people.
No, it’s about not putting “your” need to play above the children's need to nap.
No, I intended enslavement.
Extortion is very common too, and maybe more common.
Some unfortunate Grandparents may be victims of both, such as "I need you to retire early so that you can provide free childcare to us while we both work, and saying No is not an option if you ever want to see your Grandchildren again."
Our dil tried that one but my son wasn’t having it. For a year he brought the grandchildren over once a week while his wife sulked at home. She has tried to use passive aggressive tactics but it doesn’t work because we all ignore and say nothing to our son about his wife. Things are better now. With a weaker husband she may have gotten away with cutting her children off from loving grandparents.
No, I intended enslavement.
Extortion is very common too, and maybe more common.
Some unfortunate Grandparents may be victims of both, such as "I need you to retire early so that you can provide free childcare to us while we both work, and saying No is not an option if you ever want to see your Grandchildren again."
I hear you. It was my lame attempt at humor!
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