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....it's an inconvenience to them. OK, for example, they're not looking at the potential harm it could do the 'victim' instead they are looking at the crap THEY will have to deal with after the fact (possily: finding a dead body, tying up the 'victim's personal/financial affairs, or their own grief). Another example, is when people will tell the 'victim,' "What about all the people you will leave behind?" As if this is supposed to suddenly guilt trip the person into putting up with their fu*ked up life/circumstances, because someone might cry about it for a few weeks down the line.... Now, I'm not saying this is right or wrong, just saying I figured this out to be the case recently. What are you all's thoughts on this? ty
The way you are looking at it. I think both sides are "selfish". The one committing suicide is selfish for not thinking about the effect it would have on their loved ones, and the loved ones are thinking about the pain they would have losing someone they loved in such a tragic way, always blaming themselves thinking they should have done something more.
But the way I see it is anytime someone you know and loves passes away it hurts and effects everyone. I think the inconvenience of dealing with their personal matters after they are gone would be the last thing on my mind if someone I loved was threatening suicide. Even when a shooting sprees or murder or tragedy happens in your community it is painful. People have empathy. It's instilled within us to mourn and feel for someone who's passed on in a tragic manner. We imagine how fearful they felt before death. Or if they felt pain.
^^ This. The pain of losing a loved one, especially knowing that the person chose to leave this life, second-guessing oneself if there could have been a way to prevent it, etc. That's hardly the same thing as being inconvenienced. And if a person is leaving young children behind, they will surely be traumatized for a very long time.
People that really care, of course are concerned about the person taking their life and not the hassle of it after the fact. Are there exceptions to the rule, sadly there are. But those people are far more messed up than the person with suicidal thoughts. I do think friends and relatives sometimes get frustrated when they can't help one feel better and then end up saying dumb overused lines or give the impression they are tired of dealing with the situation. My own mother hung up on me numerous times when I was talking of suicide, naturally it made me feel more alone, more angry and more hopeless. So I know how the OP feels to some degree in regards to the attitudes people can get. It can make it all worse. I hope all of you here are doing ok today.
I had a friend stop by on his way through town this weekend. I had asked him about a gun and what kind of gun he would recommend. He sent me some info. So when he was in town he said he thought I was asking because I wanted to commit suicide, and then proceeded to tell me the proper way to do that so it wouldn't get botched and I wouldn't be brain damaged but still alive or something. This is a friend or so-called friend I guess who I have known for over 30 years. Go figure. Yep, I agree, its just an inconvenience. I can say that nobody would miss me. I'm alone and have felt like ending it since my wife left almost 3 years ago. My career is also over, so really, whats the point?
It's giving up on yourself. Quitting. Other people may have given up on you. A lot of people have been divorced and lot their jobs. The job market sucks and a lot of people have lost homes and claimed bankrupt too.
All I want to say is that someone in your life really loves you and you need to let this person know how you feel. They can help you find things in your life to have hope for and look forward to.
When I get really really down, I look at my life and then think of others that are less fortunate than me. There is ALWAYS someone else out there in a worse situation. Look at what you don't have wrong, look at what it could be like and count your blessings.
You have access to a computer and the Internet. That's a start. Every soul Has worth.
Don't quit on yourself. Talk to a Dr. and see if they recommend a prescription to help.
Sometimes our brains chemicals don't release enough of serotonin, dopamine, or norepinephrine or a combination. This imballance causes us to have extreme downs, ups, sideways, and backwards. There is so much known now. It's just not about depression anymore. Most are just mood-disorders. There are a variety of medicine that can help with 1, 2, or all 3 of your receptors to help. It's amazing how you can get out of that funk and feel happiness and hope again. And you don't feel drugged or medicated you feel.... Good, just good.
Please give it a try and it may take time to get used to it. Can take a couple weeks of feeling weird, but it will switch over and you'll realize!!! You may need to try different combinations or switch. Don't let the stigma of "anti-depressants" turn you off. It's better to take advantage of what we have available to help us, rather than to be down and stay down because you don't like the label. No one even has to know you're on a medication. Just you, your doc, and perhaps your pharmacy.
I hope you get feeling better and see that you're still posting.
Last edited by JohnRoxy; 12-18-2011 at 04:16 PM..
Reason: Forgot the words
I had a friend stop by on his way through town this weekend. I had asked him about a gun and what kind of gun he would recommend. He sent me some info. So when he was in town he said he thought I was asking because I wanted to commit suicide, and then proceeded to tell me the proper way to do that so it wouldn't get botched and I wouldn't be brain damaged but still alive or something. This is a friend or so-called friend I guess who I have known for over 30 years. Go figure. Yep, I agree, its just an inconvenience. I can say that nobody would miss me. I'm alone and have felt like ending it since my wife left almost 3 years ago. My career is also over, so really, whats the point?
so called friend is right.
...because there is more to life than a career....
its not an inconvenience but I think there are many people out there with no understanding nor experience with anyone close to them experiencing these sorts of issues...
...because there is more to life than a career....
its not an inconvenience but I think there are many people out there with no understanding nor experience with anyone close to them experiencing these sorts of issues...
Yes, there's more to life than a career, but if I can't get a job, any job, then I can't support myself. I've already decided I will not be homeless, so if I get close to that, I'm done.
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