Getting off Benzodiazepines and feeling 24/7 sick

[Above Average Bear]

Originally Posted by SoftTouch

Is anyone here on benzos for panic and anxiety management? What has been your experience with these drugs? I have been on these drugs long-term (Xanax, then klonopin, and now valium). Now in hindsight, I wish I had never started taking them. I am now horribly addicted and have become tolerant to the drug's anti-anxiety effects. I am currently using the Ashton protocol for detox. I switched from klonopin to valium and I am now trying to slowly taper the valium, but I am having one helluva time. I post regularly on the benzobuddies website, but thought I would post here to maybe get some different perspectives and talk to others who may be in a similar boat as myself.

I do not know if it is possible to ever come off these drugs completely and feel normal again.

Wow dude, I’ve been there. I was cutting klonopin in half’s and quarters. And trying get off. I finally went to a doc who prescribed much smaller doses to wean off. I was on 5 mgs initially and finally got off. It was well worth the pain. Hang in there and go slow.

[Butlerone]

I only started them six months ago and were wonderful for getting me to do more of my chores as we live off grid.
I did not get a buzz, no side affects that I could tell, I did not want thems longer than six months but very pour health care because doctors are booked daily worse than teachers trying to teach 35 kids, can't happen
The larazapam was what I needed during finding what is wrong with me, the doctor that I originally saw can only be seen once a month or longer even by phone visit, there were two times during this prescription that I did my part taking them and refilling them so as not to have a lapse, well two lapses happened, the first was due to the wording the doctor put on the script, kept me from refilling, so on the phone I was and I was the one who had to point out that the wording makes it seem to be taking longer than a month, 0.5 mg three times a day religiously then cold turkey from the wording for four days, luckily I think I had only been taking for two months at the time, the second time was at no refills, had a visit scheduled to discuss the prescription and staying in it and severe breathing problems with worse to no energy, the visit was a different doctor and she said we need to just get you off those, no results from the visit as said above time is of the essence to diagnose me other than mental stuff.
Five months I placed my refill went to town to get it and they forgot it in the pharmacy or somewhere , three days cold turkey nights from hell days from hell and no sleep as I was in a hyper mode and scared, NO ADVICE ON THESE AT ALL COMPARED TO WHAT I HAVE READ ON THEM, no care as to being cut off at there mistake twice, now I only had ten 0.5 mg left to wean with even though I begged and embarrassed myself trying to get a renewal, something changed after the second cold turkey, there fault, I wasn't getting near the results and now I freeze in place when trying to motivate and now can feel crying episodes coming hard and the more I try to fight it the harder it gets to move an inch, and I have my three boys dogs, behind me ready to go out or just get a touch from me, and then that piles on top of already crushing emotions I can't control till I get so tired then I get two hours sleep if I can shut my mind off, I use cannabis daily for nausea but does nothing for appetite anymore, nor is it working as well for anxiety, something happened to me during the last cold turkey they caused, the past three days I am the usual can't get dressed inside an hour , freeze up after and during shoes to shirt and after, I talk to myself in that I have to talk myself through what next, how to start a task, within two or three hours of just being up it feels like 2x4s get stuffed in my shoulders and neck, the rest of my body shuts down with inflammation and if I don't head straight for bed I won't make it and the accompanying headache is horrible, I lied down three hours later got up in and out of sleep and felt this bomb building in me, trying to fight it my body shook like a chill and then profuse crying welling for two hours or so.
Now I'm back to the mess I was before larazapam, trusting doctors again, bad mustake, but there is something wrong with me now I can't explain much more than I have, I'm locking up daily nightly try to walk ten feet walking my dogs and shake like if a ghost past through you, lack of better, and want to cry, I'm headed to therapy as I truly believe that non military PTSD is chewing in me bad and won't spit me out, this is due to many bad life events I have been through and there isn't enough space here for that, I have been sick since 2002 started with a toxic marriage loss of one of my children at forteen car accident girlfriend was driving, then was so lucky to run into another narcissist after being alone for eight years, six years of damage from her .
Hence why I started seeing doctors and asked for something to ease my days.
LARAZAPAM....... thanks for reading.

[I_am_too_sweet]

I have been to benzo hell. Its pure hell that incredibly intense feeling of impending doom and dummy me has done withdrawal hell several times.

The hardest part is forgetting what normal is and thinking that withdrawal state is normal and you 'need' to take it.

Tolerance withdrawal- What happens is tolerance rises and the dose doesn't and you end up in that constant state of withdrawal.

But anyway I never found a painless way out. Its always hell but then its over after a few sleep cycles after the days of insomnia impending doom hell.

I really hope I never ever say yes to a benzo script again. Stuff is only good for real short term use.