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My 14 y.o. great-niece's mother is deceased. She lives with her father (out-of-state) who is not "parent material". He shows no desire to care for her except for food, shelter, clothing. He also has anger management issues. It is a toxic home life and my niece does not want to live with him. He is willing to relinquish custody of her. As would be expected, she has behavioral issues.
She is temporarily with me now, but I am unable to care for her full-time permanently. I've thought about placing her in a group home situation close to me. Looking for ideas of how to find her a care provider, whether by an individual or an appropriate facility. Not interested in placing her in foster care and there are no other family members willing to help. If you have any thoughts/suggestions, I would love to hear from you. One never knows if one response would help me with this beautiful, talented child. I reside in the Northern VA/Washington, DC area. Thanks!!
Very unfortunate that there is no family member willing to commit to this young woman for the next four years. Don't put her in a group home, or in foster care. Reach out to Virginia social services for help. You should be getting a care stipend from the state for her, plus mental health services. You may even have respite care available to you. Get help, so that you can keep her with you for the next four years. Think of how you would have felt in her place, to be put into the system at age 14.
Also, keep in mind that this young woman, unsupervised, could wind up pregnant. The instant that she shows any interest in boys, get her on Depo or Implanon.
It sounds as if she has no one else. You're in the position of being her grandmother. You have to figure out a way to keep her with you through high school.
My 14 y.o. great-niece's mother is deceased. She lives with her father (out-of-state) who is not "parent material". He shows no desire to care for her except for food, shelter, clothing. He also has anger management issues. It is a toxic home life and my niece does not want to live with him. He is willing to relinquish custody of her. As would be expected, she has behavioral issues.
She is temporarily with me now, but I am unable to care for her full-time permanently. I've thought about placing her in a group home situation close to me. Looking for ideas of how to find her a care provider, whether by an individual or an appropriate facility. Not interested in placing her in foster care and there are no other family members willing to help. If you have any thoughts/suggestions, I would love to hear from you. One never knows if one response would help me with this beautiful, talented child. I reside in the Northern VA/Washington, DC area. Thanks!!
I have a great niece who was in a similar situation. She graduated from high school this year, though, and is living with her grandmother (the mother of her own deceased mother). The father is not 'good parent' material, and unfortunately the GN's younger brother is still with him.
But she is a good kid.....working.....helping at the house....but she needed to get out of the toxic living arrangement. She is trying to determine what to pursue education wise....her grandfather is willing to pay for her schooling.
Has the father actually relinquished custody? If not, I think you would have to consult with state agencies where he actually lives. You can't do anything until this happens and unless you're her guardian, I don't believe you can make any decisions for her. (plus, if you were her guardian, why would she not reside with you...although you've said you cannot care for her)
My 14 y.o. great-niece's mother is deceased. She lives with her father (out-of-state) who is not "parent material". He shows no desire to care for her except for food, shelter, clothing. He also has anger management issues. It is a toxic home life and my niece does not want to live with him. He is willing to relinquish custody of her. As would be expected, she has behavioral issues.
She is temporarily with me now, but I am unable to care for her full-time permanently. I've thought about placing her in a group home situation close to me. Looking for ideas of how to find her a care provider, whether by an individual or an appropriate facility. Not interested in placing her in foster care and there are no other family members willing to help. If you have any thoughts/suggestions, I would love to hear from you. One never knows if one response would help me with this beautiful, talented child. I reside in the Northern VA/Washington, DC area. Thanks!!
Can't Big Brother/Big Sister help? If she remains with you, they can help out on weekends.
She'll need after school help/counseling. I would ask Church groups and YMCA about their programs.
Her high school counselor will have a list of resources for you.
The only appropriate facility or group home are all parts of foster care. There is nothing besides foster care.
Quote:
Foster youth are often subjected to disproportionate discipline and criminalization, pushing many young people, including Presley, into the “foster care-to-prison pipeline”. While the foster care system is meant to provide young people with safe and supportive living situations, many of the system’s deficiencies push youth into the criminal legal system. All too familiar with this pipeline, Presley founded the “YP (or Youth-to-Prison) Project'' to increase awareness about the disparities in foster care that lead many foster youth into systems of carceral punishment. The YP Project connects young people who were failed by the foster care system to resources and advocacy opportunities: “YP stands for me, but it also stands for youth-to-prison, foster care-to-prison… [It’s a national disgrace that] 80 percent of the prison population has been in foster care.”
Are there local boarding school options? They come in many shapes and colors.
Any group home situation would be foster care unless it is for psychiatric or medical placement.
My 14 y.o. great-niece's mother is deceased. She lives with her father (out-of-state) who is not "parent material". He shows no desire to care for her except for food, shelter, clothing. He also has anger management issues. It is a toxic home life and my niece does not want to live with him. He is willing to relinquish custody of her. As would be expected, she has behavioral issues.
She is temporarily with me now, but I am unable to care for her full-time permanently. I've thought about placing her in a group home situation close to me. Looking for ideas of how to find her a care provider, whether by an individual or an appropriate facility. Not interested in placing her in foster care and there are no other family members willing to help. If you have any thoughts/suggestions, I would love to hear from you. One never knows if one response would help me with this beautiful, talented child. I reside in the Northern VA/Washington, DC area. Thanks!!
My 14 y.o. great-niece's mother is deceased. She lives with her father (out-of-state) who is not "parent material". He shows no desire to care for her except for food, shelter, clothing. He also has anger management issues. It is a toxic home life and my niece does not want to live with him. He is willing to relinquish custody of her. As would be expected, she has behavioral issues.
She is temporarily with me now, but I am unable to care for her full-time permanently. I've thought about placing her in a group home situation close to me. Looking for ideas of how to find her a care provider, whether by an individual or an appropriate facility. Not interested in placing her in foster care and there are no other family members willing to help. If you have any thoughts/suggestions, I would love to hear from you. One never knows if one response would help me with this beautiful, talented child. I reside in the Northern VA/Washington, DC area. Thanks!!
She is a good candidate for Tupelo Children's Mansion. The problem, of course is that it is too far away, but maybe they can direct you to a closer facility. https://mansionkids.org/
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