Would you leave an inheritance for an addict child? (single mom, parent, daughter)
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I would leave it with a stipulation of attending rehab again for a year at the best facility I could afford. Once completing treatment, the money would be dispersed in full. Whatever they do after that is on them but at least we gave it one last shot.
I saw a documentary that reported a celebrity's daughter was left with $100 million. She blew it in 25 years. She went to drug rehab 7 times. Obviously the best money can buy so there's no guarantee of full recovery. An iron-clad non-challengeable trust administrator and drug testing stipulations may be needed for beneficiaries with addiction issues.
Farm boy here in MN snorted Grandma's Century Farm up his nose (and related expenses) in six months. The family lost the home place where they had always gathered for holidays and funerals. Huge loss emotionally and economically.
There are some good ideas here on how to handle it. Could be a good carrot and stick to get the addict clean and staying clean long enough to begin to realize how much better life can be.
Look for a good, sober lawyer for help. Maybe Human Services can give you some recommendations.
Not without major strings and a trustee with a backbone. When you clean up and live a constructive life, and not one second before. There's no way I'll let my life's work just go up your nose or get injected into your arm.
I would leave it with a stipulation of attending rehab again for a year at the best facility I could afford. Once completing treatment, the money would be dispersed in full. Whatever they do after that is on them but at least we gave it one last shot.
I've never heard of anyone spending a year in rehab...but even for a couple months, there may not be a whole lot left of that 100k
This is not something I have to deal with thankfully but I heard this dilemma on the radio. A guy in his 60s wanted to retire and had a small but reasonably successful business. He transferred the business to one of his children.
He was planning on drafting a will that includes his wife and two daughters both in their late 20s. He is worried about one because she has been addicted to prescription drugs (opioids, benzos, adhd stimulants) since she started college. Despite multiple rehabs, she went back on the stuff.
People were split on this. Half said that addiction is something you can recover from while others said it would be signing her death warrant.
The amount of money is €100,000 for each daughter.
Yes. I would never punish a child for an illness. She may NOT be an addict. She may be habituated to these meds, which were most likely prescribed for her by a doctor. Not all habituation is addiction.
I'm a big fan of "equal". If she does not own a home, I would buy her a permanent home.
The FATHER - HUSBAND should decide. If anything, he should leave MORE to her. The other child got a business. Perhaps the well daughter should offer her a job. I would be concerned for the daughter who is ill - or habituated.
Some people live very normal lives while taking the prescribed amounts of medication. For how long? As long as their doctor prescribes it.
No. But I might buy a cottage for the addict at least to always have a place to live...if I was very wealthy leave a trust somehow to pay the taxes and utilities forever...and to follow up on repairs...while they owned it...didn't sell it.
When I gift money to a relative I always write a check directly to her Utility company ---esp before Winter....or else her dead beat son figures our how to get the money.
This is a good idea. She needs a place to live for the rest of her life, and money. Since these are prescription meds, why is their a problem? What you wrote is what I would do, if I had medically compromised relatives.
The Addiction Industry makes a fortune convincing everyone that habituation and diagnosed addiction are synonymous. They are not.
Yes, if in trust to be used for medical care and food/housing. An old friend was cut off by his rich parents and had no health insurance. He died of a dental infection because he did not seek treatment promptly and it went septic.
I’ve seen what happens when you leave a loser money. They just destroy their life. Period. I know of a 19 year old kid was left a Trust fund plus a house on acreage worth millions. The kid got a few thousand a month to live on plus a yearly lump sum of $25,000. All from Grandmas estate after she died. The kid was all about drugs, alcohol and parties and a flop house for all the other derelicts and losers in town. Well known by the police and sheriff. Last I heard he lost the property and he was in prison. Great job Grandma, you were stupid for leaving all that wealth to someone that should have been living under a bridge and meanwhile, some deserving person struggles through life doing every thing right. She did way way more harm giving a scumbag money.
Another way to look at it is that Grandma kept a roof over her grandson's head for at least a little while. At least during that time her precious boy wasn't homeless and living in a makeshift tent in a city park.
It was Grandma's money and it was certainly her prerogative to try and help a close family member that she loved and cared deeply about.
I certainly do not feel entitled to that woman's money simply because I've lived my life right, for the most part.
we had this situation in our family.
Brother-in-Law was a danger to
himself and others. multiple
marriages, divorces, drug
rehabs, i forgot most of it.
anyway, he got some inheritance money.
it did not take 12 months for his OD.
no.never.not once give an addict money.
unless your plan is to eliminate the addict.
Are they in a community support group to assist in acclimating back in to society?
How long have they remained clean ?
If they are actively/progressively getting worse, then a Trust would be set up . That Trust would have parameters to issue or deny allocation if the person fails drug test or other testing for mental awareness.
Yes bills could still be paid from it directly to the utility or rental place if the funding allows.
Coming from a family where three of us are addicts and always will be , that doesn't change. what does change is how we have remained actively clean from the use of substances that harms or sends us down a poor choice path. So it can seem so easy to SAY NO way Jose! I am not funding that person who made such poor choices, I can sincerely say- I have been the executor of a will, have been given many major corporate accounting duties, and not once did I skim or blow others monies. Being honest with assets is a virtue that doesn't come easy for some.
Be open though to alternatives for that afflicted person- in the way of financial allocation.
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