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Judgmental no? There's plenty of stable people who have had failed marriages. You know nothing about this women's relationships
Nothing? Other than they failed… and that she’s 40 (lol) so she’ll be in her 50’s and 60’s with a teenager (lol). A stable person doesn’t pursue IVF and single parenthood for the sole reason of ensuring absolute dominance over the choices made regarding how the child is raised. Absolutely judgmental, she’s a narcissist. I’d even feel sorry for the Labrador that will inevitably fill the void.
Nothing? Other than they failed… and that she’s 40 (lol) so she’ll be in her 50’s and 60’s with a teenager (lol). A stable person doesn’t pursue IVF and single parenthood for the sole reason of ensuring absolute dominance over the choices made regarding how the child is raised. Absolutely judgmental, she’s a narcissist. I’d even feel sorry for the Labrador that will inevitably fill the void.
Just for the record, I had my son at 38 - No IVF, just plain old intercourse. My 50's were pretty much as energetic as my 40's. It wasn't until my 60's that I felt my age.
OTOH, a late child frequently worries about the premature death of a single parent. If there are two parents, it's less of a concern.
Nothing? Other than they failed… and that she’s 40 (lol) so she’ll be in her 50’s and 60’s with a teenager (lol). A stable person doesn’t pursue IVF and single parenthood for the sole reason of ensuring absolute dominance over the choices made regarding how the child is raised. Absolutely judgmental, she’s a narcissist. I’d even feel sorry for the Labrador that will inevitably fill the void.
What medical school did you obtain your PHD in Clinical Psychology..just curious Internet University?
Just for the record, I had my son at 38 - No IVF, just plain old intercourse. My 50's were pretty much as energetic as my 40's. It wasn't until my 60's that I felt my age.
OTOH, a late child frequently worries about the premature death of a single parent. If there are two parents, it's less of a concern.
38 isn't all that old to have a child. I had my third at last at 35, and we had reasons for stopping there (no regrets), but I can see now in retrospect that I would have been just fine having another at 38.
Mid-40s seems to be when it gets hard on women, first to get and stay pregnant, then to cope with a small child, and to be still dealing with a teenager at 60. Based on experience with my own mom (who was 43 when I was born), and several friends who had babies in their 40s.
Mid-40s seems to be when it gets hard on women, first to get and stay pregnant, then to cope with a small child, and to be still dealing with a teenager at 60. Based on experience with my own mom (who was 43 when I was born), and several friends who had babies in their 40s.
It's such a crap shot. My sister lost her fertility before she was 30. She finally had a child with IVF at 32. A cousin had one child in her late twenties and never got pregnant again. They finally adopted a child. Other people have children in their 40's and are just fine. It's hard to know what's in store for the OP.
It's such a crap shot. My sister lost her fertility before she was 30. She finally had a child with IVF at 32. A cousin had one child in her late twenties and never got pregnant again. They finally adopted a child. Other people have children in their 40's and are just fine. It's hard to know what's in store for the OP.
Of course, there is a lot of individual variation. The average woman doesn't have a lot of trouble with conception/pregnancy in her 20s through mid-30s but fertility goes way downhill in the 40s for everyone.
There is no way to predict what's in store for one given person, but it's not wrong to say that a woman who is already 40 and just starting to think about having a baby is fairly likely to encounter some difficulty with that, of one kind or another.
IMO parenting requires alot of sacrifice and knowing when not to bring a child into the world is the first step.
Personally I don't recommend doing it alone unless you have a large sum of disposable income. Who is going to take care of the child when you are at work and after school; how about summer and winter school breaks? What happens to them if something wrong happens to you.
I have wanted to be married with children since I turned 30 but haven't met the right partner so have one more year left; otherwise will have to put it on the back burner. I have considered adoption but don't believe it would be fair to bring a child into a single parent home and adopted a kitten instead.
It's such a crap shot. My sister lost her fertility before she was 30. She finally had a child with IVF at 32. A cousin had one child in her late twenties and never got pregnant again. They finally adopted a child. Other people have children in their 40's and are just fine. It's hard to know what's in store for the OP.
I know a lot of people who had kids in their late 30s or even early 40s with no real issue. I think a lot of people who have problems would have had problems at any age. Unfortunately it’s only become more recent that we’ve gotten more aware of conditions like PCOS or endometriosis that can make getting pregnant difficult. I think only one of my coworkers had her twins with IVF in her early 40s, and one other had her eggs frozen in her 30s because she was in the military and knew having kids earlier was not a possibility.
Parenting is one of the most difficult, hard, rewarding and exhausting things to do - even with two parents. It's a huge time-suck and your life isn't your own. Literally. There is a lot you have to put on the back burning because raising a kid right takes a lot of time and energy; and even if you think you're doing the right thing, like every other parent out there, you will make mistakes (that just goes with the territory). You will devote at least 18 years of your life to raising a child, and that's a huge time commitment. You will have to get up early to get them ready for school, make sure they have lunch, make sure you have reliable and competent child care after school and during the Summer, you will be with them at night to do there homework, make and feed them dinner, for the earlier years bathe them and get them ready for bed, read a story or two (routine is good for kids), and all this after you've put a full day in at work. You'll have to contend with housework not being that great, laundry piling up, and a lot of other things. Kids get sick, and there will be nights when you have to sit up with them. And raising a kid, even modestly, is expensive.
And these are just the tip of the iceberg.
There are also a lot of great things about having a child as you get to see the world through their eyes. And you have to remember that there is no "one-size-fits-all" way to manage a kid. Each kid is different.
I would suggest you talk this over thoroughly with a counselor to ensure you are doing this for the right reasons. It's a very big commitment, and you can't return a kid when times get tough.
Judgmental no? There's plenty of stable people who have had failed marriages. You know nothing about this women's relationships
Thank Hubble, er Webb, someone said it.
There are plenty of intact two-parent families that easily qualify as "failed relationships" and "broken homes," in the sense that the marriage is so poor it has an adverse effect on everyone in the home, esp. the children.
This idea that a two-parent family is the best recipe for successfully raising children is ridiculous. My mother and I were single parents, and everyone of us - her, me and my brother, and my child - had/have advanced degrees in our fields and good jobs. I believe the educational level and income of a single parent is a much more important factor than simply the marital status of the parent, be it a mother OR a father.
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Internet University?
