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She’s been beaten a few times and her daughter has as well and the kid is not his only hers.
There was one time where she left him and said she was gonna call the cops and press charges but she never did And eventually came back to him.
She’s said before many times she’s gonna leave him for good and she isn’t in love with him but it seems to be lip service
I think it’s been 6 months to a year without abuse or at least that she admitted to but from what I know if abusers they may stop for a period to lull you back but they rarely go cold turkey
Also correct me if I’m wrong but doesn’t marriage if anything make them even more controlling and abusive a lot of times?
I guess my question is to those of you who went through this what is the reasoning for you to keep returning? And what made you finally have enough and leave?
I understand it’s a complex situation and not as easy as just leave but it’s just a difficult situation to see someone you love Bevin danger with nothing you can really do
Online articles like the Daily Mail are full of creeps who kill their wife’s or girlfriends kids. Your sister should think about this and make a decision to leave for her kid’s sake. Even if he doesn’t kill the girl, he could still abuse her.
I read these articles and honestly don’t understand why a woman would put her boyfriend before her own kids. It obviously has to do with the woman being lonely or needy, but if she has kids, it’s worth being on her own, at least until the kids are old enough. Some of these men, you have got to be kidding. I wouldn’t let them empty the trash and certainly not let them into my home and life.
If I ever got hit, I’d be gone after cracking him a good one with a fry pan. It’s a matter of self respect and not groveling to some lowlife who wants to see you afraid. I’ve always steered clear of the bully types, your sister seems to gravitate to them for some reason. Maybe have a talk with her, show her an article about what happens when lonely women let a stranger around their kids.
Online articles like the Daily Mail are full of creeps who kill their wife’s or girlfriends kids. Your sister should think about this and make a decision to leave for her kid’s sake. Even if he doesn’t kill the girl, he could still abuse her.
I read these articles and honestly don’t understand why a woman would put her boyfriend before her own kids. It obviously has to do with the woman being lonely or needy, but if she has kids, it’s worth being on her own, at least until the kids are old enough. Some of these men, you have got to be kidding. I wouldn’t let them empty the trash and certainly not let them into my home and life.
If I ever got hit, I’d be gone after cracking him a good one with a fry pan. It’s a matter of self respect and not groveling to some lowlife who wants to see you afraid. I’ve always steered clear of the bully types, your sister seems to gravitate to them for some reason. Maybe have a talk with her, show her an article about what happens when lonely women let a stranger around their kids.
Thanks. My niece is in college but she stays there when’s she’s home. My sisters boyfriend hit her once when she tried to stop him from hitting her mother.
Thanks. My niece is in college but she stays there when’s she’s home. My sisters boyfriend hit her once when she tried to stop him from hitting her mother.
It’s good that your niece is old enough to not be around him all the time. Maybe you could point out that she is setting a terrible example for her daughter. Seeing her mom get hit and still staying with him, she could start going around with the same type of lowlife. She is showing her daughter that having zero self respect is ok. Just curious, a lot of men who do these kinds of things are on meth and it shows. Maybe this applies to the loser we’re discussing..
It’s a sad situation and I wish you the best in trying to resolve it. The thing is, your sister is the only one who can decide to get out. If she doesn’t want to, nothing you can say will change her mind. It’s like any bad or destructive habit, the person has to want to change first.
It’s good that your niece is old enough to not be around him all the time. Maybe you could point out that she is setting a terrible example for her daughter. Seeing her mom get hit and still staying with him, she could start going around with the same type of lowlife. She is showing her daughter that having zero self respect is ok. Just curious, a lot of men who do these kinds of things are on meth and it shows. Maybe this applies to the loser we’re discussing..
It’s a sad situation and I wish you the best in trying to resolve it. The thing is, your sister is the only one who can decide to get out. If she doesn’t want to, nothing you can say will change her mind. It’s like any bad or destructive habit, the person has to want to change first.
I appreciate it. I was extremely angry that my sister let her kid get hit and still went back to him afterwards. I get abuse is a complex thing and not easy to just leave but you’d think seeing your kid get hit(and it’s not his child) would be one thing to wake you up
Out of a fog and the thing you wouldn’t tolerate.
I agree on the example she’s setting. When I was taking to my niece about it while she said she doesn’t like him and she didn’t say this but i almost got the sense that she didn’t think all of this was that big deal and might being starting to normalize it like you said
Maybe I misread the situation but I kinda got that feeling
I appreciate it. I was extremely angry that my sister let her kid get hit and still went back to him afterwards. I get abuse is a complex thing and not easy to just leave but you’d think seeing your kid get hit(and it’s not his child) would be one thing to wake you up
Out of a fog and the thing you wouldn’t tolerate.
I agree on the example she’s setting. When I was taking to my niece about it while she said she doesn’t like him and she didn’t say this but i almost got the sense that she didn’t think all of this was that big deal and might being starting to normalize it like you said
Maybe I misread the situation but I kinda got that feeling
Agreed, it’s hard to understand the kind of mindset where someone could hit your kid and you’d be fine with staying around. I hope your sister comes to her senses before one of them gets really banged up, it’s only a matter of time. His bad behavior isn’t getting punished, and she’s probably never pressed charges or taken a selfie of her bruises. Maybe you can get her thinking about starting a paper trail on him. That way, it will be worse for him if he injures her and there is evidence he’s done it before. Might help put him away for a few years, that would be a good thing.
Well, your niece is young and impressionable, but no way of knowing if she thinks dating a lowlife is cool. If she starts talking about a guy she’s met, have her bring him around, you can spot these types pretty quickly. I always look at their eyes first. The dead eyed look says drugs, at least it does to me.
Follow your feelings, they’re pretty reliable. Hopefully, she can get on with her life, she has a future and chance to connect to a decent guy. Your sister might eventually dump this guy, she reminds me of a friend I had, the same unfocused look every time I tried talking, she didn’t hear a word I said. They eventually split up, but she went through a lot of unnecessary grief in the process.
Agreed, it’s hard to understand the kind of mindset where someone could hit your kid and you’d be fine with staying around. I hope your sister comes to her senses before one of them gets really banged up, it’s only a matter of time. His bad behavior isn’t getting punished, and she’s probably never pressed charges or taken a selfie of her bruises. Maybe you can get her thinking about starting a paper trail on him. That way, it will be worse for him if he injures her and there is evidence he’s done it before. Might help put him away for a few years, that would be a good thing.
Well, your niece is young and impressionable, but no way of knowing if she thinks dating a lowlife is cool. If she starts talking about a guy she’s met, have her bring him around, you can spot these types pretty quickly. I always look at their eyes first. The dead eyed look says drugs, at least it does to me.
Follow your feelings, they’re pretty reliable. Hopefully, she can get on with her life, she has a future and chance to connect to a decent guy. Your sister might eventually dump this guy, she reminds me of a friend I had, the same unfocused look every time I tried talking, she didn’t hear a word I said. They eventually split up, but she went through a lot of unnecessary grief in the process.
She took a selfie of the bruises on her and her daughter the last time he hit her (that i know of at least) about a year and a half ago
She claimed she went to the police but they didn’t help much but i wonder if she did actually ever go to them or just said it
Thanks yeah I hope you’re right. The fact she just got engaged has me worried but hopefully she sees the light soon and doesn’t marry him
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