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So you can't see the advantage you had over your peers? Now imagine that you came from a household that not only didn't value an education, but actually feared it, dismissed it and accused you of thinking you're trying to get above yourself?
Do you think everyone has the strength of character to go against family and community? Do you fault people for not having the foresight, the long term view to recognize the ending of a way of life that sustained families for generations? Did you yourself realize it at the tender age of 17 or 18, or did you get lucky that you chose another path before that happened?
My advantage was that I came from a family that valued education. However, like I said, my friends had the same teachers, same opportunities. Many people along the way tried to impact their decisions for the better. As they got older they could have changed.....based on their experiences to date......they didn't, they continued down the same path! Now, did I realize what the future looked like at 17-18? Nope and without question I made my share of mistakes! But I learned and by my early/mid 20's and I adjusted! My path was not easy...multiple jobs while going to school full time and also having a family. It was a path that most would not be willing to take but as we all know, success is generally not easy and choices in life are not limited to what you do at 18!
I stopped going to high school reunions because it was depressing when you saw your fellow classmates and realized how so many were stuck. There was a lot of potential but now much in the way of corresponding outcomes. This was an all white, middle class, suburban high school with 500 in the graduating class. Expectations seemed to fall by the wayside. A large part of the problem was that inertia and complacency fueled their decisions. A lot of the guys went to Vietnam and that gobbled up a couple years and maybe some ambition. We lost a few. Many went to college and then went back to the same old place and watched it change around them. Some of them now, as retirees, are quick to play the victim card.
I stopped going to high school reunions because it was depressing when you saw your fellow classmates and realized how so many were stuck. There was a lot of potential but now much in the way of corresponding outcomes. This was an all white, middle class, suburban high school with 500 in the graduating class. Expectations seemed to fall by the wayside. A large part of the problem was that inertia and complacency fueled their decisions. A lot of the guys went to Vietnam and that gobbled up a couple years and maybe some ambition. We lost a few. Many went to college and then went back to the same old place and watched it change around them. Some of them now, as retirees, are quick to play the victim card.
I never went to any reunion. Never had any interest. I got a buddy that is a fire captain and another works at Boeing.
I have a job that sounds impressive on paper, we all did ok overall.
I mentioned I grew up very modest and working class and definitely did much better than my parents. Being broke was probably a pretty good motivator.
One way to look at personal responsibility is a person's ability to get shoved down and get back up again. With that in mind, some people get shoved down a lot harder than others and due to no fault of their own. Some people also don't have the metaphorical arm strength to necessarily push themselves back up. They need help.
Another issue I often take with this particular topic is the uniform standards in which we judge people across different ages or demographics. Should both an 18 year old and 45 year old be held to the same exact standards of accountability and expectation? Some may say "well, yeah!", but then why do we not allow them to purchase alcohol or marijuana (where it's legal)? Clearly we don't trust them the same. Should the scion of a massively successful multinational corporation be the benchmark for which a child of a working class prole is judged?
What I observe a lot of is judgment thrown around that people should know better, have a greater ability to change their circumstances. And granted, some should. However, many, many more (than we give credit to) have very little idea on how to pull themselves out of it or, more simply, don't have the resources. Even those 1st gens who went off college under the false promise that it would pave the way to a better life were left drowning in a lifetime of student loan debt instead. They were sold a bill of goods with zero guarantees attached to it. How were they supposed to know better at 17, 18, 19 years of age? They thought they were doing the right thing.
A lot of (especially older) people out there have lived a fulfilling family life with as little as a high school diploma or less, working hourly retail/factory/labor jobs, all while giving them an ability to buy property and raise families and afford their medical expenses. This reality DOES NOT exist today. And yet, we're so very disappointed at younger generations when they express the slightest grievance over this fact.
Last edited by digitalUID; 03-22-2024 at 11:26 AM..
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