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My father was put into hospice care while still in the hospital...my sisters talked him into it...he was NOT terminal when he entered the hospital...He was 93 and I believe that particular hospital was practicing their own form of euthanasia disguised as 'care'...He was ready to go home a couple of weeks before they succeeded in destroying him by causing his systems to shut down...it was a nightmare...it still is...
Indeed it must have been a nightmare. However, I cannot help but wonder how you came to the conclusions that you shared with us above. At age 93 it is not ususual for one's systems to "shut down". Your father entered a hospital, presumably for a reason. Is it possible that whatever medical problem caused his hospitalization got worse in spite of, not because of, the treatment that he was given? How is it that you know more about his condition and his treatment than the doctors who spent quite a few years studying about such things? Yes, I am aware that medical mistakes are made sometimes, and I cannot know with the limited information whether you are right or wrong. It's just that, the way you presented your demonizing of the hospital, it doesn't ring true. Let's say it is true that he was "not terminal when he entered the hospital" (leaving aside the question of how you would know that). The fact that he became terminal while in the hospital is not ipso facto the fault of improper care while there, although of course that cannot be ruled out. Is it possible that your normal grief, and yes, anger, at losing a parent has spilled over onto a convenient target?
My father was put into hospice care while still in the hospital...my sisters talked him into it...he was NOT terminal when he entered the hospital...He was 93 and I believe that particular hospital was practicing their own form of euthanasia disguised as 'care'...He was ready to go home a couple of weeks before they succeeded in destroying him by causing his systems to shut down...it was a nightmare...it still is...
Hi Dolly. You should post your dads story here too; it ripped my heart out when I read it at the other site.
I have cared for two medically fragile, profoundly physically disabled young men for over 25 years in my home and have learned a great deal about medical treatments and procedures from many "experts" along the way...but ultimately the experts disappear and me and my husband are left to piece together the confusing plethora of information...often conflicting...that the 'experts' provide...Our sons have remained healthy and happy for the majority of those years. The biggest setbacks came from hospitalizations gone bad... one where a spinal rod was placed in my son to correct scoliosis and as a side effect paralyzed him from the waist down...NOT supposed to happen...resulting in the need for extractions and catheterizations and the resultant continuous urinary tract infections, a growing immunity to one antibiotic after another...the writing on the wall for him...and a second hospitalization for a shunt revision which left him with his FIRST pressure sore in 19 years !!! He has been battling that for the past YEAR.
You ask how I know more than the doctors....well for one thing I monitored my dad's care step by step, kept records of every procedure, who prescribed it, who administered it, when, and why, and quickly noticed how each doctor was only interested in his particular 'specialty' and paid little or no attention to anything being done to or for dad by any other professional...so again I was left trying to coordinate a bunch of overworked, often self important professionals who would not or could not coordinate themselves. I also researched every drug given dad, and raised hell when I found red flags the docs never bothered to warn us about...It's not rocket science, but for that matter I DO have an exceptionally high IQ to boot...if those sorts of things give one credibility...debatable I think...but its there and I know how to use it. So what qualifies YOU to criticize ME???????
My sisters hospitalized my dad after a brief blackout in his home...he aspirated on a sip of beer, blacked out, woke up, got himself to his call button and called for help..he was totally rational, had been living in his own home with only sporadic attention from anyone, and in fact had been up to do his taxes at the Senior Center that very morning, had made his own lunch....He was certainly NOT terminally ill......but since he was 93 somebody decided he had lived long enough...that is my honest take on this mess...it DOES happen you know....more than anyone wants to admit. To the elderly and the disabled....and its only going to get worse with the lack of humanity that permeates this sorry world.
There is a world of difference between your post to which I responded and the one above. The first one sounded like generalized anger spilling over onto the doctors and hospital. The one above, in rather stark contrast, provides enough information to allow us to see what you are talking about. Therefore, it has credibility. Just dumping angrily on doctors is not the same as presenting a case that doctors did not care properly for your dad. You have now presented that case, which is what I was asking for.
There is a world of difference between your post to which I responded and the one above. The first one sounded like generalized anger spilling over onto the doctors and hospital. The one above, in rather stark contrast, provides enough information to allow us to see what you are talking about. Therefore, it has credibility. Just dumping angrily on doctors is not the same as presenting a case that doctors did not care properly for your dad. You have now presented that case, which is what I was asking for.
It's not easy to go back through those times again which is why I didn't start out with the details...it was about this time of year that dad 'died' and as I have been warned by others those times will often open the wounds wide once again...they are right. I have lost some of the intense anger I felt towards my sisters....not completely, but some...maybe there were just too many of them trying to make decisions for him, I don't know..I had to leave for a couple of weeks right after dad was sent to a 'rehab facility' "to get stronger before going home" ...I had to take care of my own guys too and was going to come back when dad went home to help make sure everyone knew how to do whatever needed to be done for him there....he never made it obviously and I blame myself for not being there for him soon enough to have stopped the disaster from going where it went...but they didn't TELL me what was happening to him ...anyway the wounds are not healing very well and I get my back up when someone fails to understand how this thing went down...I have friends that do hospice care in peoples' homes here in WV and I am not against that kind of care at all...its just that in my dad's case, it WASN'T hospice care he was getting..... it was euthanasia disguised as 'hospice'
My father just passed away at the hands of Hospice. I read the paperwork after he passed and it said that he was unable to sign the paperwork. I talked to him on the phone the day the paperwork was signed and he was fine. I told him I would be up to see him oh Sunday and we then talked about the family for over 45 minutes. My sister signed it in his place. He was not terminally ill but just old. At 93 I guess one just lives longer than is wanted. I am so sad. I think about how scared he must have been. I overheard the hospice nurse talking with my sister and she said that after she arrived he wanted to know what was going to happen to him. So much for that. My brother say him the next day and said he was fine. He died the following day. Under morphine medication for some type of pain I was told.
All I know is one more day on earth with my DAD is worth more than anything else that one could give. I intend to find out more. I cannot rest on this one.
I'm sorry to hear about what happened to your dad in Moderator cut: not allowed . It sounds like his life was shortened by the Morphine. This was not your fault I'm sure your dad knows you loved him. There are so many families with the same experience as you had at Hospice. Everyone needs to tell their stories about Moderator cut: not allowed . Families needs to be told exactly what's going to happen when their loved one is admitted. I think what Moderator cut: not allowed advertises and what you actually get at Moderator cut: not allowed are two different things. A persons chances of coming out of Moderator cut: not allowed are not very good. Once Moderator cut: not allowed starts the ball rolling with the Morphine until the person is unresponsive. I don't think they back off even if the family wants them to. They tell you it's part of the illness. When in fact as in my fathers case it was all the medication and not the illness as they told me. As soon as the medication stopped my father started coming a live again. It's been 10 months since they almost killed him. He is still home with my mother, he has a dental appointment today. Amazing isn't it?......
Last edited by SouthernBelleInUtah; 03-01-2011 at 12:52 PM..
[quote=ctmaryb;17808978]Families needs to be told exactly what's going to happen when their loved one is admitted. I think what Moderator cut: not allowed advertises and what you actually get at Moderator cut: not allowed are two different things. A persons chances of coming out of Moderator cut: not allowed are not very good.[quote]
Isn't that the point? People are not supposed to be admitted to hospice unless they are terminal. It is supposed to be a place to go where aggressive medical treatment is withheld because it is deemed useless in that particular case, and where the dying process can be made as comfotable and painless as possible. I must be really missing something here. Or maybe the operation of hospice in the states with which I am familiar is completely different than what you are talking about. It seems we do not have the same understanding of the meaning of the word. The usage with which I am familiar is that a doctor has to determine that a patient has less than six months to live in order for hospice services to be made available. Please explain.
Last edited by SouthernBelleInUtah; 03-01-2011 at 12:52 PM..
hey if you think something was wrong investigate and investigate some more and dont let anyone tell you no . I wish you luck and my condolenses on your loss .
hey if you think something was wrong investigate and investigate some more and dont let anyone tell you no . I wish you luck and my condolenses on your loss .
I know lots of things were wrong...but he is dead so what is the point? I'm having a hard enough time dealing with the loss without having to fight with a medical conglomerate. It's definitely not about money for me. Its about my dad being gone for no good reason because somebody decided it was time for him to die. I know they will continue to do the same thing to others in that hospital but somebody else will have to stop them...Im too overwhelmed and too tired just trying to keep my disabled sons alive.
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sad time of year for me
