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I don't know if this really fits in this category, so Mods feel free to move this if you don't think it belongs here. I know that frugal living folks do a lot of buying, selling, and bartering for used items so I figured this was the best sub-forum.
I have a disagreement regarding the etiquette of buying/selling used items online, or even from an ad in a newspaper or flyer.
If I am selling an object, and place an ad, when someone calls and requests to come and "look at the item" at a later time (maybe 8 hours later, or the next morning), but no definite deal to purchase has been made, am I obligated to NOT sell that item if someone else can come earlier and wishes to purchase it? In other words, should I hold it, and possibly turn away other callers, until the first caller can come see it? Do I need to NOT show it to anyone else, or make a deal, until the first caller has an opportunity to see it and decide if they want it or not? Or is it that the first person who can show up with money in hand can take it away, as long as I notify the first caller about the sale before they come over?
IME, how it goes is that the first person to call the seller MAY say "please don't sell it before I can see it", and then the seller MAY say, OK, but if you don't meet me by noon, it may go to someone else.
Then when a second person calls the seller, the seller MAY say, I've got a potential buyer, but if they they don't follow through by noon, I'll call you.
In other words, be honest, but limit the number of promises you make.
No deal is done before the cash changes hands. And, BTW, unless you have a VERY good reason to do otherwise, accept nothing but CASH. It's also a good idea to meet in a public place.
I purchased my van this way. The seller brought the van to an agreed-upon, very public spot, I checked it over, and made an offer. We both went away. Later he called and accepted my offer. I met him again, in another very public spot, we filled out the paperwork, and I handed him cash. We each had someone else present, and neither of us ever saw the other person's house.
Most people really are honest, and honest people don't get huffy about the precautions other people feel they need to take. It's a very bad sign when the person you are trying to deal with pressures you and doesn't want to meet you half-way. Nothing at all obliges you to continue to deal with such a person.
Thank you for your suggestions regarding safety. I also like your suggestion of putting a time limit and being very upfront about any other offers. I have had a few calls of people wanting to come see a very inexpensive item, and wanting me to wait 8 hours or more for them to "look at it" when other, later, callers want to come right over purchase it. So now I feel like I have to repeatedly tell other buyers to wait until someone, who may not even buy the item after they see it, gets around to coming over. I've waited before, and had people not show after I held the item for them. I feel like I am turning away buyers who may not want to wait. It's not something major like a car, just a piece of furniture.
I hope I get some more responses so I can get a general consensus of how other people deal with this for my future sales.
If you want to do first come first served, then do it. Just let the people know you aren't truly saving it for them if you are not going to do it.
We've always saved it for them as promised. Unless you need the funds quickly that's a different story. Either way always get back up names in case the person is a no show
Thank you mezup12. If someone says they "want to come over and look at it tomorrow" but have not agreed to buy it, would you hold off on letting anyone else see it or buy it? Does agreeing to let them look at it tomorrow imply that I'm holding it for only them?
Thank you mezup12. If someone says they "want to come over and look at it tomorrow" but have not agreed to buy it, would you hold off on letting anyone else see it or buy it? Does agreeing to let them look at it tomorrow imply that I'm holding it for only them?
Thank you mezup12. If someone says they "want to come over and look at it tomorrow" but have not agreed to buy it, would you hold off on letting anyone else see it or buy it? Does agreeing to let them look at it tomorrow imply that I'm holding it for only them?
I thought the 'fair way' for a transaction is : time to preview is from Sat til Sunday at noon. Seller will contact final offer. Then do it.
I recently had horrendous discord with some sellers. One played the 'first come first serve' , then said but hey for 300$ more I can sell it to you ,money on the spot. I said , no deal.
Second seller played the: it's in the garage for final inspection (I was impressed that he wanted to get it turned up). Then weeks went by...I contacted every three days. Maintained interest. Finally he emails the five person's still interested. Said, "today only! First with cash gets it. I was two hours away ! I was beyond fed up with being strung along and then given short notice. He knew I wanted the car ...then himhawed on getting it back on the market. Shadier then a Willow tree he was.
I give all folks a fair preview contingent on the product. If it 5 bucks...vs a high priced item that deserve a bit more consideration from both sides.
I don't waste ppl times and in equal fairness . .don't waste mine if your going to play bidder war.
Thank you mezup12. If someone says they "want to come over and look at it tomorrow" but have not agreed to buy it, would you hold off on letting anyone else see it or buy it? Does agreeing to let them look at it tomorrow imply that I'm holding it for only them?
I am confused. People don't agree to buy things unless they see it so if you want to hold the item, let them know you will hold it for them until they arrive. If you don't want to hold it that's ok. I'd just let them know so they are not driving to your house for nothing.
Give them your phone #, tell them "Call before you come over to see if it is still available." If you have a lot of people interested, tell them that. Might light a fire under their behind.
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