Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
It's also fun to hit the local lakes for outdoor adventures keeping in mind that those in my friends group who are well-off enough to own boats aren't generally going to be joining us for those activities. Those friends will sometimes have us on their boats for fun times in which case we bring food and drinks to them so we're doing our bit as we can afford to do so.
As someone who has friends who of better means than I and those who are of lower means, I accept that there are times when I'm either going to have decline an invitation to do something with the more affluent friends (or accept that I'm not going to be invited at all) or to have to simplify things for those who I know cannot afford to do some things that I would like to do.
I live within 30 miles of Kentucky Lake, a 160,000 reservoir on the Tennessee River in western Kentucky. There is a place where you can rent pontoon boats from $225-$250/day, plus fuel. (For you fishermen, a 17 ft. bass boat rents for $125/day, plus fuel.) I know a couple of couples who will split the cost of a pontoon once a summer, then load up a little grill, a bag of charcoal, and a good picnic to cook. They ride around a while, then find a clearing on the bank, tie the boat up, and start grilling. Most of the time they won't run the boat very much, saving on what gas they have to pay for. Just find their picnic spot, set some chairs up and enjoy the scenery.
Some great responses. Certainly food and drink tends to be a great equalizer, as does enjoying the great outdoors. Personally I always preferred house parties and home cooked meals to clubs and trendy restaurants anyway.
I suppose it gets easier once you're established and you no longer need to put on airs with good friends. The young have a tough go of it, and some of those groups are merciless to one another. Are you really going to have an AMAZING time seeing a concert and knowing you've got rent paid with $50 to spare?
I live within 30 miles of Kentucky Lake, a 160,000 reservoir on the Tennessee River in western Kentucky. There is a place where you can rent pontoon boats from $225-$250/day, plus fuel. (For you fishermen, a 17 ft. bass boat rents for $125/day, plus fuel.) I know a couple of couples who will split the cost of a pontoon once a summer, then load up a little grill, a bag of charcoal, and a good picnic to cook. They ride around a while, then find a clearing on the bank, tie the boat up, and start grilling. Most of the time they won't run the boat very much, saving on what gas they have to pay for. Just find their picnic spot, set some chairs up and enjoy the scenery.
That sounds like so much fun!
Where you live sounds a lot like where I grew up and in some ways, not unlike western Pennsylvania which is where I now call home. Plenty of lakes, rivers, creeks to have fun on and near. Back home in Ohio, the pontoon scenario is something that a lot of people like to do if they don't already own one of their own. My family had a "normal" motor boat when I was growing up; we had a lot of fun with it both with just us and with family friends. Tubing is also hugely popular with people of all ages where I grew up. Tie together a bunch of tubes and a few plastic coolers filled with beverages and spend the afternoon floating lazily down a creek. Good times.
The kind of boating to which I was referring was the type that involves docking privileges at local clubs. My ex's folks had one of those sorts of boats until the Hurricane Ivan rolled through Pittsburgh, taking it and pretty much every other boat on J-Dock all the way down to the Point. Boat was totaled, FIL opted to pocket the insurance money instead of replacing the boat, and that was the end of our boating fun. It was fun while it lasted, though. Current partner's folks were into sailing, which involves more serious cash than my folks were willing and able to spend on recreation.
Some great responses. Certainly food and drink tends to be a great equalizer, as does enjoying the great outdoors. Personally I always preferred house parties and home cooked meals to clubs and trendy restaurants anyway.
I suppose it gets easier once you're established and you no longer need to put on airs with good friends. The young have a tough go of it, and some of those groups are merciless to one another. Are you really going to have an AMAZING time seeing a concert and knowing you've got rent paid with $50 to spare?
Eh. I don't feel sorry for anyone who feels the need to "keep up with Joneses." Sure, the young might be having a tough go of it, but the social aspect of it is largely self-inflicted nonsense. (And I say that as someone who was once young herself and definitely enjoyed youth while it lasted.)
For example, if they're silly enough to go YOLO in order to see a concert with hardly any money left to spare after buying tickets, that's on them. I could certainly see doing such a thing as a one-off treat (i.e. the recent Taylor Swift show), but if a young person is constantly rationalizing spending money unwisely in order to do what their better off (or equally fiscally foolish) friends are doing, I have zero empathy for them.
If their friend and acquaintance circle consists of constant oneupmanship and spending money foolishly in order to maintain a veneer of success, they'd do well to find new friends as that sort of crap doesn't tend to improve with age.
I must have a weird life. I've never been in any particular friend group along the way where the differences were so great that it would be this significant. The closest would be work related attendance at a mandatory fun formal event where the high rollers did their "we're one of you" shake hands with the workforce events.
I must have a weird life. I've never been in any particular friend group along the way where the differences were so great that it would be this significant. The closest would be work related attendance at a mandatory fun formal event where the high rollers did their "we're one of you" shake hands with the workforce events.
When I met my wife, I made significantly more than her. It recently came out in a discussion that she struggled to keep up with my lifestyle. Obviously, if I had known, we could have cut back because time with her meant more than any entertainment expenses.
Now she makes more than me, but we have a general understanding around our financial wellbeing. At our age and with our circumstances, going out is definitely treated more as a luxury item.
These discussions always remind me of an episode of Yes Dear. Greg was used to nice trips and hotels and Jimmy rents an old junkie RV so they can vacation together. What he thought was a good deed wasn't appreciated. I can see the same happening in real life when people assume everyone likes what they like.
We post on Facebook and tell them to let us know who is coming. Some will go to breakfast at IHOP but not the expensive steak places. I and most will go to both, but some will only show up at the less expensive places.
Location: Formerly Pleasanton Ca, now in Marietta Ga
10,345 posts, read 8,559,492 times
Reputation: 16679
I have friends of different wealth levels. I am flexible. I can go up or down. I just don’t mix the two groups together unless it’s an easily affordable event.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Current partner's folks were into sailing, which involves more serious cash than my folks were willing and able to spend on recreation.
