Friend Marries Man with No Green Card, Asks Me to Vouch in Writing for the Validity of Their Marriage (sponsored, citizens)
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You made the right decision. The guy, most likely, is using her to get a green card.
This is very true.
I married a man from another country and this was something I had to consider myself.
My husband knows quite a few people who did marry for green cards. It is a felony to do this, though, and I would not even be involved in it by writing a letter. Nobody owes this man anything.
I am going to go against the rest of the recommendations you've gotten.
All your friend wanted was a letter attesting to the validity of their marriage. You don't need to know if he is illegal or not or even have met him. All you had to do was be a friend. She wasn't asking you to lie and say that you know him or have dinner with them 4 nights a week or anything else. All you had to do was write a letter telling the truth. I assume you have had several conversations with her? You state she is a friend so I assume that means you have somewhat frequent contact to catch up and stuff. If so all you had to do is write a letter saying that every indication that she has ever given you leads you to believe this marriage is real and so on.
There are no legal consequences for writing such a letter so long as you don't lie.
Now if talking to your friend she never mentioned this guy or getting married then of course it would be hard to write anything good about it. But I assume she has talked about this guy and what she has told you would lead a reasonable person to assume its a genuine relationship. Thats all she wants you to confirm.
Its not fair for her to drop this in your lap? Get real. You claim she is a friend. This is what friends do. They help each other.
Glad your not my friend.
What bearing does meeting the man have on a friend writing a letter saying that she believes the marriage is genuine based on her knowing her friend and have numerous conversations.
I can tell, most of what follows is incorrect or misleading.
yes it does. How he entered the country matters a great deal.
Incorrect. An immigrant cannot file for a family based visa on their own. The sponsor has to do it.
In this case your most likely correct but this isn't always the case. There are exceptions when you have been married to a US citizen for a long time before applying for a green card.
How would it be lying? She doesn't have to say she met him, only write a letter stating that based on conversations with her friend she believes the relationship is real.
I'm sorry, but your entire post is ignorant and incorrect. Reading comprehension is not your strong suit apparently. How he entered the country does matter... great, you agree with my post on that.
I didn't say he'd be filing for a visa, I said he would be applying for a green card. IE, NOT THE SAME THING. A green card (Permanent Resident card) is not a visa.
My post is correct, thank you very much. She would be lying if she did what the OP was asked to do.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atlanta_BD
One of my friends got married almost a year ago to a man from another country. A week or so ago she sent me message telling me that his legal status is "teetering" and asked me to write a letter to state how emotionally and psychologically damaging it would be for her if he's deported. That he's upstanding and well-respected. Please bear in mind that I've never met him and I didn't know he was in the country illegally before then. My friend lives in another state.
She told me that if I was to write this letter, no legal consequences would befall me. I learned during this conversation that he's been in the country illegally for over 10 years. We got into an argument of sorts because I let her know that it wasn't fair for her to drop this in my lap expecting me to vouch for their marriage when I have never met him and I wasn't aware that he wasn't in the country legally all this time; and I don't know if he's using her for citizenship. I just find it suspect that he's been here illegally all this time and all of a sudden it's a pressing issue for him to get a green card now that they are married.
I decided not the write letter but I am curious. Are there consequences for third-party vouching for a marriage where one party has been in the country illegally long-term?
Yeah, vouching for a marriage that the OP knows nothing about is in fact, LYING. There's a reason why you're the only one proposing she write the letter.
No letter you could write would make any difference if this guy came here illegally in the first place. At first I thought he came here on a visa and they got married. If that had been the case, they could have gone to an immigration lawyer and probably gotten an adjustment of status, which would give him a green card=legal resident.
But if the entire thing has been underhanded from the beginning, a letter from you would probably just get them in more trouble by calling attention to the situation.
A big problem to begin with is that it's too hard for someone to stay here legally. You either have to possess a high end qualification, often in the sciences or you have to be engaged to marry. If you are engaged, you go through the process, then, when Immigration says OK, you come here and get married and apply for legal status. Other than that, it's pretty hard to get into the US. Thus many people come here illegally.
It sounds like this guy is taking advantage of your friend by living with her and marrying her. But that won't work. And no letter from anyone is going to change that.
I agree with the majority of the posters. You shouldn't get involved. You don't know for a fact they're married, unless you were there when they got married. You only know that she told you they got married. She asked you to say you know him and didn't know he was here illegally, etc. All lies, since you don't know him.
On one hand, I think that friends don't ask friends to do something illegal or unethical. Then again, I might cut her some slack for this request only once, since she is obviously under the spell of this Romeo.
Expect to get a call from her in the near future telling you she's pregnant.
Don't get involved. Once this guy gets his citizenship, he's going to drop your friend. It happened to my friend from high school, and left her with a baby!
A lot of things don't come together here. I'm sure there are a lot more stories not told here or miscommunicated or misunderstood by OP.
1. There are so many people with illegal status marrying a citizen and getting a green card through a legitimate legal process. The 3-year/10-year rule applies to all other immigration status except immigration through marriage. A rule of thumb is, regardless of how many years they were illegal, once they marry a citizen they get some sort of amnesty. Of course there are exceptions--those who had crossed the border illegally--meaning that they never had any "status" in the US, then they are essentially out of luck, and some other exceptions like criminals, etc.
2. Those illegals marrying a citizen seeking a legal process of getting a green card start the process immediately they get married. Why? Because it takes time and money and once you file in the application, you will not get deported, so they do it right away. In OP's friend's case, they were purportedly married for a year and just now they are making a fuss about this? Something fishy here.
3. As several people pointed out, a friend's letter would hardly have any impact toward legal immigration, except a chance for OP to get into future trouble. And it is strange that OP's friend doesn't seem to know this. What had made her think that her friend's letter could help her? She would be either cluelessly stupid or there's some other untold stories.
4. This guy had just a wrong assumption that marrying a citizen would automatically grant a green card??? Actually, I'm not sure that is a fact or not, but if that's indeed what OP's friend said, then I can guarantee that this guy is a total fake and a con man.
The reason I say this is---ALL in the illegal status, probably all except for a few morons, know nitty-gritty details of the immigration law very well, including any new development related to immigration in the Congress or President's EO's.
It's like all convicts know the criminal law and all the ins and outs of the legal system very well, a lot more than ordinary Joe.
So, if he said to OP's friend, "Oh, I thought I was getting a green card automatically because I was married to you," this might look like an innocent statement to ordinary Jill and she would fall into it, but to me, this looks like a 100% lie.
I don't know if the relationship is real or not. Based on conversations I've had with her and things she's told me about him, I suspect he's using her under the false assumption that marriage would guarantee him a greed card as an illegal border crosser (which she told me herself that is he is a border crosser). In that case, I want no involvement in it because why didn't he try to get citizenship before marrying my friend? Why now after over ten years of being here illegally is it pressing for him to get a green card after he just happens to marry her at the courthouse?
I don't know if he's using her or not. I suspect that he is and she wants to believe he married her for love.
I knew that she was dating the guy and eventually moved in with him. She did not tell me she was married to him until after the fact. There was no engagement or wedding. She just told me that he asked her to go to the courthouse to get married and she said yes.
She hasn't told me everything and didn't tell me he was illegal until after they've been married for almost a year a needed me to write a letter. She hasn't even told her own mother they're married.
And friends don't let friends make poor life choices. Had she told me from the beginning she was involved with an illegal immigrant, I would've cautioned her against it--which is why she's just now telling me--she knew I'd talk her out of it. By her own admission, she sees him as her last ditch effort to be in a relationship.
And no, you wouldn't want me as a friend because when I see nonsense and shenanigans, I call it out. And if you can't handle a friend being honest with you, you are right. We wouldn't get along at all.
With that info...I wouldn't do it either.
I am the same way with my friends and family. In fact some have accused me of being too harsh but they get enough coddling from everyone else. Someone needs to tell them the truth.
Being married in this case isn't going to help him one bit. He entered illegally. He has no status. He cannot just apply for status now. He will need to leave the country and do it that way. If he gets found out they will ban him for 10 years.
I'm sorry, but your entire post is ignorant and incorrect. Reading comprehension is not your strong suit apparently. How he entered the country does matter... great, you agree with my post on that.
But thats not what you said. You said if he gets married then he gets a green card.....
As far as my reading comprehension goes, there is this quote about throwing stones and glass houses that comes to mind
edit: I didn't see the second post. I was referring to the original post. Sorry for the confusion.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katana49
I didn't say he'd be filing for a visa, I said he would be applying for a green card. IE, NOT THE SAME THING. A green card (Permanent Resident card) is not a visa.
lol. You don't apply for a green card. You apply for a visa that gives you a green card. lol.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katana49
My post is correct, thank you very much. She would be lying if she did what the OP was asked to do.
Actually much like this post...very little is correct.
She wouldn't be lying if she told the truth. Not sure how thats possible. I never said write a letter and lie. I said tell the truth.
speaking of reading comprehension.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katana49
Yeah, vouching for a marriage that the OP knows nothing about is in fact, LYING. There's a reason why you're the only one proposing she write the letter.
Again. I didn't say for the OP to lie. I said she doesn't need to know the guy. All she needed to do was put down what she though about the marriage based on her conversations with her friend. Its not a lie.
and after the OP clarified that her friend hasn't said much about the marriage then I wouldn't write the letter either.
Correct^^^ Op you're only putting a target on your back if you get involved, something that you may regret and have to live with forever.
This was my exact thought once I learned he never had any visa. I wanted no parts of that. I have my own life to live. The last thing I need to add to my plate is getting entangled in someone else's legal mess.
Not only is it a target on my back, if he is genuinely in love with her, they have done more harm than good to themselves, because now that she is trying to help him get a green card, it is going to bring attention to the fact that he has been here illegally. She did mention having to go down to Juarez but that is just going to flag him. She is worried that he is going to be in more trouble under the Trump Administration but with the immigration laws being as they are now, he never had a leg to stand on to begin with whether Trump became president or not.
He will be banned either way if they go down to Mexico for consular processing. Even if she went down to Mexico and married him there, it would still be considered visa or green card fraud if she went to his country to marry him so he could come back to the US and get citizenship if I'm not mistaken.
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