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For example, do you smoke weed, drink, exercise, etc to deal with life? I find that I need something most nights to feel good. And most nights it’s one of those 3 things. Now I also started wood working in my garage, but it’s not as effective as exercise or weed( puts me in a meditative state).
Take a walk in the boonies, watch a favorite escapist or sci fi movie, favorite classical instrumental music, re-read a favorite book. The re-reading aspect is important. If I'm really stressed, re-reading takes less concentration and I get pleasure out of the familiarity. I have never used alcohol or other recreational drugs. It isn't really a matter of feeling good, it's just getting my mind onto a different track for a while. In very rare cases if its late at night and I can't wind down enough to sleep, maybe a Tylenol PM, but I realize that's a very temporary respite. The stressors will be back the next morning.
I work very long hours (software development) which takes away from personal and family time; so personal and family time is my focus on weekends. Soccer games, music, etc... For me, I take the time to tinker with one of my hobby interests including R/C cars, hydroponic grows, archery, and crafts. Night time is spent hanging out with friends at the local pubs and clubs.
On weekday nights, I work as a bar back and bartender w/ a friend of mine. My friend enjoys the help and I give her all the tips. I enjoy serving up a drinks to our regular customers, chat a bit, and share a few drinks too. I also enjoy closing up at night. So yeah... to relax a limited amount of drinking and smoking (weed and cigars) is enjoyed in between working behind the bar.
I use meditation. Every day, most days twice a day. In the morning and late afternoon. This one is the most helpful for me.
Also hobbies. I like to work with my hands, it relaxes me very much. Knitting, drawing, painting, cleaning the house, cooking, a grow a small garden on the balcony etc.
I exercise most days. It's very relaxing. Usually I don't want to do it but after I start, it always helps. A walk in the forest, or lifting weights, Pilates, aerobic, QiGong etc. Aprox. 30 min/day.
For example, do you smoke weed, drink, exercise, etc to deal with life? I find that I need something most nights to feel good. And most nights it’s one of those 3 things. Now I also started wood working in my garage, but it’s not as effective as exercise or weed( puts me in a meditative state).
TV theme nights, a TV show and a movie each night, "ARAMCO TV" because growing up, that's how our TV was from ARAMCO, a TV series or two and then an old movie (that wouldn't upset the Arabian censors). Otherwise, the station was off the air.
The shows and movies are rather random but they fit to the theme of that particular night. So, last night, Wednesday, was SUPERCHICK where women have a very strong role. Last Night was Diary of a Call Girl/Inspector Lynley mysteries
Thursday: Cops & Robbers so like The Streets of San Francisco/a Brit Mystery
Friday: Horror & Fantasy so like Bitten/Burnt Offerings
Saturday: Sci Fi & Fantasy so like Charmed/Dr. Who story
Sunday: Men and Women of Steel (or play on the word Steel) so like The High Chaparral/a Western
Monday: Swords & Clubs so it has been Highlander and sword and sandal flicks
Tuesday: DIE, SPY! Espionage so that could be The Adventurer or Hogan's Heroes and a spy flick.....like The Doll Squad!
As that this approach is really my only way to relax, to be assured to come away with a good feeling, not only do I really look forward to each night but it has become something of a compulsion that if I miss a night, I make up for it on the weekend. Of course, part of that is that the DVD library is so big, who is going to outlast who?
What you need is a fatty-boom-batty blunt, a copy of Black Sabbath's debut album and Trailer Park Boys on Netflix. I guarantee you'll wind down in no time!
Seriously, I find hobbies that I can do on my own like hiking or fishing. Both let me relax and forget the day's troubles.
Summer is easy. I go to the pond and take my floatie, a good book and some iced tea and soak in the good vibes.
Or go for a cycle ride in the country looking at wildlife and flowers. Wade in the river. Or do something mindful outdoors like hand weed my flower gardens. All of those things are very calming for me.
There would have been a time for me when this wouldn't have worked but now as an older woman with no grandchildren I can really enjoy an hour spent at a park watching young people play.
The winter here is more difficult. I usually spend at least a month in a low-key spot on the ocean in Mexico. At home I get together with a friend or two for word games and coffee. A visit to the greenhouse or a zoo with an environmental habitat. Couple of artsy-fartsy hobbies. Usually have a project or two in progress.
I'm one of those lucky people who can get "lost" in a book for a couple of hours. And as mentioned above, there is a lot to be said for mindfulness. Doing a task with focus and deliberation can be a good exercise in erasing the day's cares. It's especially good for me if I have something to show for it when I'm done.
When all else fails I fall back on Bill Murray's advice in "Meatballs." "It just doesn't matter! It just doesn't matter."
Simplistic? Well, yeah, but true. It might matter if the "big it" happens but it won't make a whit of difference whether I worry about it or not.
I think where we live or work causes the most stress ... apart from that its other people who shovel their own worries on to your shoulders.... should be avoided like the plague... I find being on my own with my wee dog and a good film is great for my stress... I also love history and love researching online......If possible a long slow walk in a country park with the beautfiul smells and away from the world, tall trees waving in the wind...... a good clear out of old clothes and rubbish from cupboards seems to help too.. a messy house is a messy mind and all that.. Some say yoga or exercise is good for them.. also sitting near a deserted beach with waves crashing off the rocks..I love this..only live in the city and not near a beach.
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