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- Is it an age thing? (i.e., Younger people say it to people who are clearer older than them?) If so, then why have "middle-aged" men & women said it to me? I'm only in my late 30's!!!
Young people are more likely to use when addressing older people. However, I'm in my 20's, and I've been addressed as "Sir" by someone in their 80's. It is not strictly one way or the other.
Quote:
- Does anyone think it sounds subservient.....and/or has racial undertones (from the days of slavery)?
No, I don't. I suppose if you look hard enough, you can find racism in anything.
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- Or, is it just a very polite way of addressing people?
Pretty much. On occasion, I act in a customer service capacity for my organization. In the south, it is expected that you say "Sir" and "Ma'am" when working in customer service - as a waiter or a waitress, for example. This is a good indicator of how "southern" a place is, whether you see this or not.
MzMiss, I too am from PA and if I were your parent or school administrator I would be mortified at your question.
I am not attacking you directly but your entire generation so please don't be offended and welcome to the boards.
My thoughts:
Your questions prove that common decency is becoming a thing of the past.
Learning to address elders, or others with respect might damage your generation's self esteem
You give proof to my argument that every young person in America, regardless of whom their daddy is, should serve two years in the military where you learn proper use of "Sir and Ma'am (or Miss)"
MzMiss, I too am from PA and if I were your parent or school administrator I would be mortified at your question.
I am not attacking you directly but your entire generation so please don't be offended and welcome to the boards.
My thoughts:
Your questions prove that common decency is becoming a thing of the past.
Learning to address elders, or others with respect might damage your generation's self esteem
You give proof to my argument that every young person in America, regardless of whom their daddy is, should serve two years in the military where you learn proper use of "Sir and Ma'am (or Miss)"
Holy Yikes! Wait, let's step back here a minute. I did not at all mean to sound disrespectful....and I really don't think my generation of thirty-somethings (and our self esteem???) has anything to do with this.
Plain and simple, I am a very good, polite, and respectful person. My parents in PA never taught me to say "Yes Ma'am / Sir", etc. but that doesn't mean that they were ill-mannered people or raised their children as such. Rarely did I ever hear anyone in PA address another person as "Yes Ma'am / Sir"......and I hear it all the time in NC.....which is why I posed the question. It seems to be a regional difference, and I just wanted to understand the appropriate usage.
I think there are many effective ways to teach manners to young adults, but we'll have to agree to disagree on whether forcing them to serve two years in the military is an appropriate solution. Proper parenting would be at the top of my list.
- Does anyone think it sounds subservient.....and/or has racial undertones (from the days of slavery)?
Just to clarify....before someone else takes issue with my posting.....I included the above question because I had a disagreement with a friend over whether "Yes Ma'am / Sir" sounded subservient. She thought it did, but I disagreed. It was a perspective that I hadn't considered, so I included it in my posting to get other's input.
MzMiss, I too am from PA and if I were your parent or school administrator I would be mortified at your question.
I am not attacking you directly but your entire generation so please don't be offended and welcome to the boards.
My thoughts:
Your questions prove that common decency is becoming a thing of the past.
Learning to address elders, or others with respect might damage your generation's self esteem
You give proof to my argument that every young person in America, regardless of whom their daddy is, should serve two years in the military where you learn proper use of "Sir and Ma'am (or Miss)"
Actually, I have often thought if every young person upon graduation from high school had to serve a mandatory 2 years in the military like they do in Israel our country would be SO much better off
I know the use of yes sir/no sir and yes ma'm/no ma'm is more common in the south - but I certainly thought it was being taught in other places BESIDES the south. How disheartening that a young person can grow up today and never have been taught this most basic form of respect for ones elders. And to our op, to us when this respect is not given that is what is rude by southern standards.
I use "sir" and "ma'am" all the time to anyone of any race, any position, any occupation and just about any age. It's a habit, but a sincere one. I also say "please" and "thank you" all the time. In my opinion, it's rude not to say these things.
As with most things, it depends upon how you say it, and to whom.
I have always considered it a polite form of address, but resented my parents making me use it when I did not believe the person worthy of the 'ma'am' or 'sir.' I use it when I address my elders (and I am in my 50s). My Father still wants me to answer him with 'yes, sir,' or 'no, sir.'
I used it around my daughter, and taught her to use it in certain circumstances, but because of the mixed feelings I have, myself, I didn't insist on her addressing me with 'yes, ma'am,' and 'no, ma'am.' When addressing any adult, I did insist upon a complete and acceptable response -- a 'yes' or 'no' and not yeah, nah, huh, and the like.
I think you are safe using it in the South, especially around older Southerners. I don't know that they necessarily expect it, but I think they appreciate it -- like anyone does, being treated with respect.
I use "sir" and "ma'am" all the time to anyone of any race, any position, any occupation and just about any age. It's a habit, but a sincere one. I also say "please" and "thank you" all the time. In my opinion, it's rude not to say these things.
Absolutely!, and so do I, and since I am a long time 'native' here, quite often I am addressing someone much younger.
One of the greatest benefits of raising my children in the South...it's second nature for my children (ages 8 and 4) to say, "Yes Ma'am, No Ma'am, Yes Sir, No Sir"...and not just when they are in trouble! Whenever we visit our families in IL, the relatives just rave about our children and their polite manners!
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Whenever we visit our families in IL, the relatives just rave about our children and their polite manners! 
