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Not sure this is the right forum to put this, but I took care of a very sweet lady who passed away.
Her family did not want her to be embalmed!
What could possibly be the reasoning in this? I do not understand!
I don't really see a point in embalming, unless you want an open casket. Personally I think it is a huge waste of $$$$. When I die, I want to be creamated.
Not sure this is the right forum to put this, but I took care of a very sweet lady who passed away.
Her family did not want her to be embalmed!
What could possibly be the reasoning in this? I do not understand!
people want more control of what happens to their loved ones?
You can do your own funeral in Texas - no need to go to a funeral home:
Catholics prefer the body is at the funeral. Then cremation. Then burying the ashes. No spreading.
All priests do not follow this,
Thanks for your comment.
Just did some quick research. Before 1997 the cremation had to take place after the funeral mass, but in that year the rule was changed to allow cremation before the mass.
The incident I cited took place in 1987, and that explains why the priest cited church regulations as the reason for his refusal to have a funeral mass.
I don't think there's a "right or wrong" to embalming someone, and it totally depends on the circumstances, even if one initially doesn't want to be embalmed.
For instance, my husband died out of state. It took SIX DAYS to get his body autopsied, and then released, and then transported and then the funeral. Not trying to be gross, but I wanted to see that man, that body. One last time, you know? Closure. Well, for starters I think it was state law that he be embalmed to cross state lines. Plus, like I said, I wanted to see him. There was no way, in that time frame, that I could see him, or that he could even be transported for burial or cremation, without being embalmed.
Same with my friend's dad, who died out of the country.
In New York, during the pandemic, you couldn't see your loved ones once they entered the hospital. Seeing him again at the wake was wonderful for me. Yes, my head knew he was gone but the rest of me found great comfort in seeing, touching, and being able to lay my head on his chest for the last time. I miss him.
My parents chose not to be embalmed (to save $$). While I try not to think about the natural process of decay, it really boggles my mind that they spent so much on the caskets but elected to forego embalming. One other factor in this choice -- Dad thought he would be able to see Mom at the funeral home the next day to say a final goodbye, but of course the funeral director advised against it.
My daughter-in-law's mother was a young woman when she died earlier this year, and DIL adhered to her wishes to have a green burial, so no embalming in that case, either. Because it was a green burial, the casket was very rustic and she was buried in a forest adjacent to the cemetery. That seemed more "right," if that makes any sense.
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