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OP, I am so very sorry for your loss. I lost my mom 8 months ago. Many in this forum can relate to the profound sadness you are feeling right now. A day doesn’t go by that I don’t fight back the tears when I remember my sweet mama. I am so grateful that I grew up with a loving mother.
Yes, it’s a sad and lonely road we must walk when we realize our loved one’s days are numbered. I remember when we were told the initial diagnosis, and finally when her oncologist took me in the hall to give me a specific timeframe. I prayed for a miracle, but the Bible says there is a time to be born and there is a time to die. It’s a hard reality.
It is a small comfort that she was ready to go and she knew how much she was loved. But oh how I miss her and wish she was still here. The other night I dreamt her and she gave me a hug. Those are the comforting moments I cherish now.
I am so sorry for your loss and I pray that you will have strength in the days ahead. You will get through this. I have a feeling that your mom would tell you the same. As FD and others have encouraged me, “be kind to your self.” You are not alone.