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Hello. I am not sure if I am posting in the right group. My husband was taken to a hospital last year. They told me my husband had an opioid overdose. I couldn't believe what I heard. I was shocked.
I've been counting days since the 1st of January, and it seems like this withdrawal will never stop. I don't even know if it is a withdrawal, or he took another dose of painkillers. He has been a different person for 10 days straight.
Anyway, I feel like on the 1st day of the New year I lost my husband. He was the most wonderful man I could dream of. There was always kindness in his eyes. He was the most hardworking man I've ever seen. We had so many plans. I don't have friends (it's a long story). First, I was mad, I screamed at him. I was angry at whoever was responsible for this. Then I talked to my mother, and she told me to forgive him. He is a sick person. I am filled with devastation, sorrow and utter sadness. I keep asking God why. I got married relatively late in my life. I don't know if there is still something left off my husband.
I vowed to make it work through good times or bad. I don't know if I was ready for this. I just want our happy life back but I don't know if I have strength to fight. Will the family (me and our baby) pull him out of this mental disease?
I wish you well. My fiance' is my only friend really too, so I know how that aspect feels. (However, I can stand alone if I have to & won't tolerate bad treatment from anyone).
So, you're aware he takes painkillers, but didn't realize how much? Are you two looking for a drug rehab program for him to get into OR is he not taking any of this that seriously?
Opioid addiction is a physical disease that can create a mental disease but it doesn't start with mental. I really wish you well because this is a very difficult situation. He must want to get help and that's very tricky.
It's true it would be nice for you to forgive him but it's going to take far, Far more than just forgiving him to get this problem resolved.
He refuses rehab. His mother is saying what they do in rehab is just getting him addicted on another opioid that doesn't give them side effects. She is also sure that he would get out of this on his own.
I am just so devastated. We had so many plans. One of our plans was to have a second baby. It isn't getting any better. How could someone change so quickly. My heart goes out to others in my shoes too. I am doing quite a lot of research. Thank you.
Last edited by gttstyl4v; 01-12-2022 at 02:26 PM..
I am just so devastated. We had so many plans. One of our plans was to have a second baby. It isn't getting any better. How could someone change so quickly. My heart goes out to others in my shoes too. I am doing quite a lot of research. Thank you.
Why bring another child into this toxic environment, please consider someone else besides your hubby. Major concern should be taking care of you so you are a parent who is focused and present. He is not capable of being a husband or a father as long as addiction rules his life. Google Alanon and work with a sponsor. The only person you can change is yourself. Good luck!
He refuses rehab. His mother is saying what they do in rehab is just getting him addicted on another opioid that doesn't give them side effects. She is also sure that he would get out of this on his own.
Quote:
Originally Posted by gttstyl4v
I am just so devastated. We had so many plans. One of our plans was to have a second baby. It isn't getting any better. How could someone change so quickly. My heart goes out to others in my shoes too. I am doing quite a lot of research. Thank you.
Well, always remember...YOU have the power over your own life, so no matter how long you've been married OR what kind of plans you had in life, if things get bad & he won't keep up his part of the marriage such as getting better, going to rehab, etc., then YOU must take action over YOUR life so you can have contentment. Marriage is a partnership. It's not fair if one spouse is good trying to have a good life while the other just doesn't care, slacks off, does things to detriment & bring down the whole relationship, etc.
It's also NOT up to you to fix him. People can talk till they're blue in the face, but the person themselves have to want to change. So, you're not obligated to, "hang in there & see what happens" after giving him time or chance to improve. YOU take control of your life & if that means getting divorced & starting a new life, then so be it, so don't be afrid of that. Life's way too short to wallow in misery for long. That's why I always believe that women should have a good education to be able to stand on their own 2 feet & be financially independent at all times, so when things happen down the road, they don't have to put up w/ horrendous squat.
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