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Moving to a new area kind of makes you reset your friends. You have a lot more interaction with other parents with kids your age and frankly the vast majority of people where I live have kids. So we basically made friends with other parents. I know few on a personal level over 30 who don't have kids.
As for friends from my old life, I can only think of 2 people who never had kids and its harder to relate to them as time goes on. I don't know what people do with their lives when they are 40 and childless/single. It is so hard to imagine what it would be like...
They just sit at home and cry about being childless and single, obviously. What else is there to do in life?
I don't know but I won't go out with people who have kids and I don't want people with kids coming to my house.
People without kids are smarter than people with kids so they don't like us.
And people with kids hate the fact that us childless folks have more peace of mind and freedom than they do.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!! (Doesn't your arm get tired stirring that pot?)
As a single mom, I have some friends who don't have kids and some who do. I did have to drop a childless friend recently because she was rude when I said I couldn't do something bc of the kid or when I asked if my kid could come along. Then the next time I asked her to do something, she accused me of "using her" when I needed a single friend. Her rudeness caused me to end the friendship. It wasn't because she didn't have kids. She apologized later, but I was done.
I believe her reaction was coming from her insecurity about not having kids, or from just being needy and paranoid by nature. If this sounds like you, then this could be why your friends with kids think it's easier not to invite you. On the other hand, I have other friends in various life stages and situations who are always understanding and kind, accept where they are in life, accept others' challenges. Those friends get the phone calls and the invitations.
I don't know but I won't go out with people who have kids and I don't want people with kids coming to my house.
People without kids are smarter than people with kids so they don't like us.
And people with kids hate the fact that us childless folks have more peace of mind and freedom than they do.
I’ve been told by a few people that they can’t relate to people that don’t have kids. I notice my friends will go out with me as a couple when they have a babysitter but if a night with a just women they only invite moms, not me or other people without kids. And these aren’t kid related events. Some people almost seem shocked if I tell them I don’t have kids. It makes me feel worthless sometimes. I notice how they portray women in movies or tv that don’t or can’t have kids as crazy also.
Shame on those doing that sort of telling. Talk about shallow.
My best friend is married and without kids, and she was the best babysitter I ever had, and to this day she's looked upon by my kids as being their second mom, and I will be friends with her forever.
I stayed friend with as many people who did not have kids as those who did. Your relationship to kidless friends changes but it does not have to end. Several of my friends took on an aunt/uncle role with our kids. You just need oto learn to avoid obsessively talking about every detail of everything your kids did last week. That is a good thing to learn with anyone, but especially with kidless friends.
I mean, by default, a parent ends up spending a LOT of time around other parents due to school activities; sport events, PTA meetings, kid birthday parties, etc.
I still had friends without kids (or whose kids were grown) but I just didn't have as much time to spend with them.
Now I'm on the other end - with a grown son and a friend who rarely has time to spend with me due to her work and raising a teen-age girl that's involved in everything.
I don't get upset because kids take up a LOT of your time. It's hard to imagine how much without having had one.
I want to make it perfectly clear that I believe one can have a satisfying and fulfilled life without kids as well. I know plenty of childless couples who were able to travel a lot AND retire earlier because they didn't spend all their money on a child.
I stayed friend with as many people who did not have kids as those who did. Your relationship to kidless friends changes but it does not have to end. Several of my friends took on an aunt/uncle role with our kids. You just need oto learn to avoid obsessively talking about every detail of everything your kids did last week. That is a good thing to learn with anyone, but especially with kidless friends.
Funny thing is, many cases of childless people having children late and then turning into the very thing they criticized regarding talking about and posting about their children.
That whole "I'm special syndrome" that made them extra annoyed when it was about some else's child but then also extra annoyed when they're called out on the very thing they were criticizing (hypocrisy).
No problem with having childless friends (I already do). I don't think it is a bad thing... and in some cases, for the better. Everyone should simply let people live their lives.
I’ve been told by a few people that they can’t relate to people that don’t have kids. I notice my friends will go out with me as a couple when they have a babysitter but if a night with a just women they only invite moms, not me or other people without kids. And these aren’t kid related events. Some people almost seem shocked if I tell them I don’t have kids. It makes me feel worthless sometimes. I notice how they portray women in movies or tv that don’t or can’t have kids as crazy also.
Maybe it's you. Do you cringe or make faces or look disinterested when the conversation doesn't directly relate to your life experience? I'm guessing you may emit a aura of "disliking kids" and possibly viewing parents as "breeders". People are sensitive.
Offer to be a sitter or help with the kids. Show some slight interest. It's FINE to not want kids but they are part of life (duh).
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