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4 weeks and 3 days prior to Oct 16 would be Sept 15/16. Basic math.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Penguin_ie
I am surprised they saw enough on a sonogram to date the pregnancy at 4 weeks 3 days. Assuming that date is correct though, it is more likely to be your friend's, but it is not impossible that it is the other guy (ovulation doesn't always occur in the middle of a cycle, and other guy's sperm could have ben waiting around a while).
Yeah, I thought it took at least two weeks for the sperm to reach the egg? Since anything is possible, and at this point it could either be 50% her ex, or 50% my friend, either guy could really be the one.
As hypocore said, "basic math." However, if its true about the two week travel time, it could most likely be her ex, right? Because 6weeks from Oct 16 is Sept 4 (two week sperm travel time on a 4week pregnancy).
According to her, she hasnt really decided IF she ever will tell either one. As of right now, they dont know. However, if she decides to let either one know, she wants to make sure she tells the one whose the likelier (is that a word?) candidate, to save the other one from unnecessary grief.
Yeah, I thought it took at least two weeks for the sperm to reach the egg?
No, I think you're a bit confused. Ovulation typically happens about two weeks following the first day of a woman's last mestruation (LMP), but it can vary. On average, sperm live five days in a woman's reproductive tract. The ovum (egg) lives approximately 12-24 hours after eruption from the ovary.
What's more significant in this story is the ultrasound results. Because of the rapid changes to both the embryo and the woman's body during early pregnancy, which progress in a very predictable manner, first trimester ultrasounds combined with HCG levels are fairly accurate for pregnancy dating.
If she is remembering the dates of intercourse correctly, your friend is the father.
Last edited by formercalifornian; 01-14-2010 at 11:01 AM..
"Pregnancy doesn't always start the day that partners have intercourse — it can take up to six days after intercourse for the sperm and egg to join and form a fertilized egg. Then, it can take six to 10 days for the fertilized egg to completely implant itself in the lining of the uterus. Pregnancy begins during implantation when the hormones needed to support pregnancy are released"
^^I got that off of Yahoo! Answers. I worded my previous post incorectly, I apologize. I didnt mean to say that sperm lives for 9days, I meant to ask doesnt it take up to two weeks for the whole pregnancy process to be complete?
The sonographer used terminology that is a bit confusing when he dated the pregnancy at four weeks/three days. A forty-week pregnancy includes the two weeks prior to conception. In October, your acquaintance was actually six or so weeks into a forty-week pregnancy.
I stick by my assertion that your friend is the father, but your acquaintance would be wise to schedule a prenatal paternity test for confirmation. Her doctor can give her the details. I think it's a mistake for her to cut the father out of the picture completely, unless there is a very good reason to do so.
Last edited by formercalifornian; 01-14-2010 at 10:47 AM..
I think she needs to tell both men and set up the appropriate tests. There is no way to know for sure until she does. This is not the time for guessing games.
The father of this child deserves to know that he has a child out there. If he decides not to be a part of it's life then, so be it. He still should have that option and the child should know who his/her father is.
This is quite a pickle, but for what they're worth, here are my thoughts...
She doesn't actually have to tell both men. Only one needs to be tested for her to have her answer. If it were me, I'd choose the party guy because they're not emotionally involved. I doubt he'd be devastated if it turns out that he's in the clear. If the ex is the father (not likely, but just in case), she never has to reveal that she slept with another man, and she can save everyone a trip through the emotional wringer.
Here's another option...the OP could help her acquaintance obtain a sample surreptitiously. A water bottle or cup from which he's drunk, a used toothbrush, and strands of hair could all be used without his knowledge to confirm or rule out paternity.
Last edited by formercalifornian; 01-14-2010 at 11:51 AM..
I agree with those who have pointed towards my friend being the dad. I think deep down she was hoping that it was her ex because as Hopes had mentioned, they at least have history together.
Former: but what if she ends up telling the wrong guy? Now she will have told both of them which is what she is hoping to avoid. In a way, I feel sympathetic for her because I dont know what I would do if it were me in that situation. On the other hand, I dont feel THAT bad due to her carelessness.
Too close to tell. If she explains the situation to just one, she's got a 50% chance of telling the actual father, and that would prevent having to tell two different people.
I do hope she goes ahead and confirms who the father is. Yes, a yucky situation, but this child deserves to know for sure who his or her father is, and that father deserves to know that he has a child.
If it were me, I would start with the ex. Being that they have all this history, he's eventually going to find out she's pregnant, do the math, and wonder if it's his, even if she tells him that the baby is not his.
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Since anything is possible, and at this point it could either be 50% her ex, or 50% my friend, either guy could really be the one. 
Because 6weeks from Oct 16 is Sept 4 (two week sperm travel time on a 4week pregnancy). 
