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Hi guys, bored at work here and I decided to start a discussion about why some people are trying to sugar coat obesity. This may be a controversial subject with different opinions, but please enlighten me. I have always wanted to talk to someone about being obese, but my friends and family simply dont understand because they are not fat.
So for the past few years, I have seen facebooks and Instagrams of women who are dressed in bikinis or taking sexy boudoir photos and promoting self love. They encourage other obese women to love themselves the way they are. I dont understand this. Being obese myself (I used to hate that word so much because with obesity comes many health risks), I feel like this message is aimed at me, and I dont agree. I love myself as an individual, but I DO NOT want to accept my body the way it is. There are many changes that needs to be made. Not only do I want to look good, I want to be fit and healthy at some point in my life. I want to live for many more years to come. If I embraced my image the way it is now, that is almost guaranteed never to happen.
I also hear arguments about "oh, just because you're fat doesnt mean you're unhealthy. I am 250 lbs and dont have a single diagnosis and being thin doesnt guarantee that someone is healthy either." In my opinion, it is always better to be thin (being in a healthy bmi range). I agree, just because someone is thin doesnt mean they are healthy, but the vast majority do not have health risks that are associated with being obese. If you are obese now, and hold your head up high thinking you're ok now, but what about tomorrow or next year? I am obese and let me just say I am very paranoid about my health. I am scared going to the doctor and getting some sort of bad news that there is something wrong with me caused by my health. This is a motivation for me to get out of the circle. I wasnt always this big. There was a time where I only weighed 115-120 lbs. I felt awesome, and I was never paranoid about health related issues. I am only 5 ft 3, I am not meant to carry this much weight on my small frame.
Also, there are many people who refuses to accept criticism. They will gouge your eyes out if you try to give them helpful advises especially concerning your weight. I used to hate it when my husband voiced his opinion about my outfit choices, but he's right. I should dress for my size because I will look more presentable and confident. Some clothes really arent meant for obese people (A few years back I thought crop tops were cute, but would I look good in them? nah). If you choose to wear it, to each their own.
Sorry for the long post and I hope I dont come across as being harsh or judgmental, I just dont understand why obese women are dressed in bikinis or walking the streets in lingerie trying to promote this message and trying to get validation for their condition. I am so tired of being obese.
Some of the self loathing and paranoia you feel are because you are overweight. You know it and you want to change it. What are you doing to change it?
Do you want strangers and anyone on the street walking up to you and giving you advice because they think you need it? What if it were not about your weight but your hairstyle? Or your make-up? Or your clothes?
Do what works for you and don't worry about anyone else.
I am obese and let me just say I am very paranoid about my health. I am scared going to the doctor and getting some sort of bad news that there is something wrong with me caused by my health. This is a motivation for me to get out of the circle. I wasnt always this big.
So what are you actually DOING to change things? And what will you do if your best efforts to lose significant weight prove ineffective or unsustainable over the long-term?
Quote:
Sorry for the long post and I hope I dont come across as being harsh or judgmental, I just dont understand why obese women are dressed in bikinis or walking the streets in lingerie trying to promote this message and trying to get validation for their condition. I am so tired of being obese.
Perhaps they're just enjoying life and not obsessing over their bodies. Why should obese people have to go out of their way to hide their condition from others? Do we make ugly people with severe facial scars wear bags over their heads? Should people who limp just stay home, rather then going out in public and exposing the rest of us to their abnormal gait?
And being tired of obesity changes nothing. That requires major changes in lifestyle, which once adopted can never be relaxed. Some folks can do that, but others can't.
There's more to life than fixation on your weight. Focus on eating a healthier diet and getting regular exercise. Unlike your weight, those are under your direct control, and are areas where most Americans (fat or thin) could stand considerable improvement.
I am making changes and I lost 20 lbs. I still have a long ways to go but I no longer have to lose x amount of weight that are in the triple digits. I am all for loving oneself, and all I am referring to are obese people who actually enjoy being obese and telling others that its ok to be obese as in "dont change your obesity." I am not talking about handicapped people, or people who have scars or other conditions, thats a totally different story. I should've ended the comment by saying "to each their own, if you want to stay obese, its your choice." Its none of my business, but its on tv shows and on the news and I come across it and clearly if its out there, people are entitled to an opinion. I know not all obese people are on the same page. Some have medical conditions and others have a slow metabolism, what I curious about are the ones who say they enjoy being obese, and on the news there was also this woman who wanted to compete to be the heaviest woman on earth and her one meal is like a feast. I'm not judging, I just wonder why anyone would willingly want to stay obese.
I think for many people it's simply a bit of a pendulum swing. There was a long period when being fat also meant to many that you were lazy, stupid and probably morally deficient. It meant you should hide and be perpetually ashasmed of yourself. Loving yourself at any size is a way for a lot of people to "reclaim" themselves in a way.
Being unhappy with your weight is no guarantee that weightloss is going to happen. Conversely, accepting your weight and feeling good about yourself is no guarantee that you don't care to improve yourself.
Because loving a person is accepting them AS IS. Then if they want to modify themselves...that can be an avenue to pursue.
I had to love myself as is before I even considered health changes.
I'm less inclined to support a person who knowingly abuses themselves or others...as seen by some comments on having obesity...
Love yourself as is...then decide ...
Thats where the difference lies. You love yourself and decided to make changes. Whenever I see an obese person at the gym I am so amazed by them. I am talking about obese people who really want to stay that way, and say that they love it. There is a woman I read about who got paid to eat as much as she can in front of her customers...its more of a fetish. I still dont understand why. I guess we cant answer for a group of people. Sorry, I was bored at work and brought this up. Kind of a meaningless post. Now back to eating my salad.
There can be a healthy medium: Love yourself enough to want to improve your health.
I think the more people yell about "fat acceptance" the more they really know deep down inside that they must do something about their health. It is a form of denial, and they have to say it louder and louder to get themselves to believe it.
Obesity is never healthy. Ever. I do not care what people say about that. They are wrong. It is not a matter of opinion. It is a matter of science. Obesity causes diabetes, heart disease, and many other conditions that make people die young. Obesity causes inflammation in the body that is harmful. This is a FACT. I will go so far as to say obesity is a disease state itself.
However when someone has a disease this does not make them unworthy of love. It is not okay to discriminate against people because of their weight or make people feel bad about themselves because they are overweight, just like it is not okay to discriminate against people who have asthma.
To love yourself is to treat yourself kindly AND smartly. "I know I am overweight. This does not make me a bad person. But if I want to live a long life, feel better, and do more things with people I love, I must treat my body better than this. It is the only body I have and I must take care of it. I must love it enough to do right by it."
Hi guys, bored at work here and I decided to start a discussion about why some people are trying to sugar coat obesity. This may be a controversial subject with different opinions, but please enlighten me. I have always wanted to talk to someone about being obese, but my friends and family simply dont understand because they are not fat.
So for the past few years, I have seen facebooks and Instagrams of women who are dressed in bikinis or taking sexy boudoir photos and promoting self love. They encourage other obese women to love themselves the way they are. I dont understand this. Being obese myself (I used to hate that word so much because with obesity comes many health risks), I feel like this message is aimed at me, and I dont agree. I love myself as an individual, but I DO NOT want to accept my body the way it is. There are many changes that needs to be made. Not only do I want to look good, I want to be fit and healthy at some point in my life. I want to live for many more years to come. If I embraced my image the way it is now, that is almost guaranteed never to happen.
I also hear arguments about "oh, just because you're fat doesnt mean you're unhealthy. I am 250 lbs and dont have a single diagnosis and being thin doesnt guarantee that someone is healthy either." In my opinion, it is always better to be thin (being in a healthy bmi range). I agree, just because someone is thin doesnt mean they are healthy, but the vast majority do not have health risks that are associated with being obese. If you are obese now, and hold your head up high thinking you're ok now, but what about tomorrow or next year? I am obese and let me just say I am very paranoid about my health. I am scared going to the doctor and getting some sort of bad news that there is something wrong with me caused by my health. This is a motivation for me to get out of the circle. I wasnt always this big. There was a time where I only weighed 115-120 lbs. I felt awesome, and I was never paranoid about health related issues. I am only 5 ft 3, I am not meant to carry this much weight on my small frame.
Also, there are many people who refuses to accept criticism. They will gouge your eyes out if you try to give them helpful advises especially concerning your weight. I used to hate it when my husband voiced his opinion about my outfit choices, but he's right. I should dress for my size because I will look more presentable and confident. Some clothes really arent meant for obese people (A few years back I thought crop tops were cute, but would I look good in them? nah). If you choose to wear it, to each their own.
Sorry for the long post and I hope I dont come across as being harsh or judgmental, I just dont understand why obese women are dressed in bikinis or walking the streets in lingerie trying to promote this message and trying to get validation for their condition. I am so tired of being obese.
You can want to improve the body you have right now without hating yourself along the way.
It is simple. You only get one body. You shouldn't pause your life and hide at home till you think it is perfect (or acceptable).
You can and should accept yourself as is. And you deserve to be accepted and have self-esteem at all sizes. It isn't about sugar coating, but you don't have to hate yourself because you have weight to lose.
There can be a healthy medium: Love yourself enough to want to improve your health.
I think the more people yell about "fat acceptance" the more they really know deep down inside that they must do something about their health. It is a form of denial, and they have to say it louder and louder to get themselves to believe it.
Obesity is never healthy. Ever. I do not care what people say about that. They are wrong. It is not a matter of opinion. It is a matter of science. Obesity causes diabetes, heart disease, and many other conditions that make people die young. Obesity causes inflammation in the body that is harmful. This is a FACT. I will go so far as to say obesity is a disease state itself.
However when someone has a disease this does not make them unworthy of love. It is not okay to discriminate against people because of their weight or make people feel bad about themselves because they are overweight, just like it is not okay to discriminate against people who have asthma.
To love yourself is to treat yourself kindly AND smartly. "I know I am overweight. This does not make me a bad person. But if I want to live a long life, feel better, and do more things with people I love, I must treat my body better than this. It is the only body I have and I must take care of it. I must love it enough to do right by it."
This is a pretty false dichotomy. You may treat your body "well" and still be overweight. Better to do the right things and the right habits (eating well, eating your veggies and staying active) and let the scale fall where it does. You may lose weight. You may not. But doing the right things will make you a lot healthier than those who are not.
Our society encourages weight loss at any cost - even to the detriment of being healthy. Why don't we focus on everyone just adopting and maintaining healthy habits?
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