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My mom was creepy. Apparently she bragged non-stop about my kids (lots f people in my hometown told me). But when we went to visit her, she wouldn't play with them or talk to them. When I asked for her help (like hand me the diaper wipes) she would act super put out. So when people brag about their grandkids excessively, I am always a little suspicious.
Same situation with our kid's braggy grandma- she is 110 times more concerned about bragging to her hometown and showing off pictures of them than she is in actually getting to know the kids and having a relationship with them. She is obsessed with the idea of them but really doesn't care for the actual kids. I think most Grandparents are just proud, full of love , actually know their grandkids & just want to share. However, Yes I find our situation creepy!
My mom was creepy. Apparently she bragged non-stop about my kids (lots f people in my hometown told me). But when we went to visit her, she wouldn't play with them or talk to them. When I asked for her help (like hand me the diaper wipes) she would act super put out. So when people brag about their grandkids excessively, I am always a little suspicious.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wanderlove
Same situation with our kid's braggy grandma- she is 110 times more concerned about bragging to her hometown and showing off pictures of them than she is in actually getting to know the kids and having a relationship with them. She is obsessed with the idea of them but really doesn't care for the actual kids. I think most Grandparents are just proud, full of love , actually know their grandkids & just want to share. However, Yes I find our situation creepy!
Yes, it seems that some grandparents love the "idea" of being a grandparent but not the "actuality" of being a grandparent. I am so sorry.
Both my parents and my in-laws rarely "bragged" about their grandkids and rarely even showed pictures of them. They had family photographs on their walls but I don't even think that they carried photographs around with them. However, they really loved their grandchildren and did many, many things with them when we would visit them or they would visit us.
Anifani...I enjoyed your post. Thanks for the common sense...A few weeks ago I took my cat to the vet and ran into a female acquaintance who was there with her dog....The woman spent the entire time boasting and bragging about her new puppies...and showed me photo after photo of her mama dog and puppies...as if they were her grandkids.
TO HER THEY WERE HER GRANDKIDS.
Not everyone happens to have children, by the way. AND not everyone has contact with their children or has grandchildren in his/her life.
My dog is more important to me than most people are (except my husband) and better mannered than most children!
New puppies trump a new baby (yawn) any day of the week.
I have 10 grandkids and 6 greats. I only brag when someone asks about them. Of course tho, 4 of them are always either with me, or have just gone home. (They only live 2 blocks away). But I do brag on the one who is 3 today. (I'm killing time till time to leave for her party). But, this is the one who found a box of cornstarch, and decided she needed some all over her and the whole house, finger painted the walls in the playroom, and her baby sister, removed all the legs off her Barbies, and one of the legs became her new doll. And that's only a portion of her antics. She's a riot!!
SO, let me tell you about each and everyone of my grandkids. Get comfy though because there are 13 of them
I married a second time, and we had our kids a little later. Our children are in college. It will be a very, very long time before we have a grandchild.
Honestly, if grandparents want to share photographs with other grandparents - fine. But, if you know that another person does not have any grandchildren, it is rude. And boring.
For me, it's like bragging about your children - only worse. Maybe I can remember your two or three kid's names, and since their is a direct connection, I may have some interest. But if you have nine grandchildren - please don't expect me to remember them - or be that interested in what they do.
I am sick of having phones thrust in my face with demands to look at each of your double digit number of grand children.
Do you detect sour grapes. Uh uh. I think people need to retain a sense of self, interests, and a way to converse without relying on their children. And especially their grand children.
My rule of thumb is to talk about my grands in the same amount and same way that I enjoy hearing about other people's grands, This means only to a few and not very much.
Being childfree I don't want to hear about your kids, your grandkids or any of that crap. We had (as in past tense) some close friends whose daughter and husband decided to sprog. We made the mistake of going to their house for dinner (invited) while daughter and grandsprog were there. The wife spent the whole evening with the daughter and grandsprog and totally ignored us. The husband couldn't hold a conversation for trying to see what the wife, daughter and grandsprog were doing. Needless to say that has been 4 months ago and we've not been back and most likely never will.
Being childfree I don't want to hear about your kids, your grandkids or any of that crap. We had (as in past tense) some close friends whose daughter and husband decided to sprog. We made the mistake of going to their house for dinner (invited) while daughter and grandsprog were there. The wife spent the whole evening with the daughter and grandsprog and totally ignored us. The husband couldn't hold a conversation for trying to see what the wife, daughter and grandsprog were doing. Needless to say that has been 4 months ago and we've not been back and most likely never will.
They didn't miss him when he was an invited guest.
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